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 |   Another plate full of the meat and vegetables of my life. |
| I planned on writing a blog today, even if it was only to report on the continued good weather, the lack of excitement and the time spent in La La Land. But as I was walking home from there, I was trampled by a crazed elephant that had escaped from the local wildlife park owned by Lord Filthyrich and had to be rushed to hospital. At the hospital they gave me an injection, but it was actually meant for the woman in the next bed. This left me officially deceased but being resistant, I managed an out of body experience which found me looking down on the blog list and noticing I wasn't on it. So, then I panicked. Not being able to find a better body to return to, I reluctantly had to re-enter my own, then rushed from the hospital wearing an operating gown and flagged down a taxi. Realising I still needed to write a blog I jumped from the car and went into a shop demanding pens and notepads in order to make notes. The problem was it was a baker's shop where the shop assistant took one look at my attire and called the police. The police knocked me around a bit after I informed them I needed to get home to join the list of silly bloggers, then took me to the police station and threw me into a cell. After an afternoon in jail shared with a drunk and disorderly gnome called Arnold who tried to convert me to Buddhism, I was released on bail. I was broke by then, so had to catch a bus home, which took a detour through London where the driver insisted we all visit Buckingham Palace to share cucumber sandwiches and camomile tea with Her Majesty. When the bus finally dropped me off at the end of my street, I told the other passengers my blogging friends would probably never believe the day I've had. So, I finally got to blog, even if it was only to report on the continued good weather, the lack of excitement and the time spent in La La Land. |
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