Toadette's Story

Chapter 24 - Sweat Training

Breaking the reality of the situation to Princess Daisy was easier said than done. But, having Minh T. at my side gave me a bit more comfort. She’d be an okay shield.

The princesses were in swimsuits, sitting in long chairs around one of the garden’s great pools. Even under the umbrella, Her Highness rocked a pair of shades.

“Hardly surprising,” Her Highnesses commented. “Shy Guys always carried a reputation for being thieves.”

“I was under the impression of petty thefts. Not messing with royalty.”

“We can break into their base tonight,” I said. After nearly burying me alive, there was nothing I craved more than seeing these guys get their well-deserved punishment.

But Daisy stuck her hand out. “Stop right there. We got our hands dirty enough for the past two days. Peach, you and your other Toads can take it from here.”

Her Highness glared at Daisy before laughing. “Always asking for more, aren’t we? I already gave you Toadette, and you still want to eat up more of my resources.”

“Yes, I do. Do you have a problem with that?”

“You could say that.”

In an instant, Daisy lunged out of her chair and yanked Her Highness’s arm. Her puffed cheeks and furrowed brows made for an intimidating appearance. Well, intimidating by my standards, and certainly by Minh T.’s. So, why was Her Highness so calm?

“This whole mess started in your kingdom! So yeah, you’re gonna get off your lazy butt and deal with those Shy Guys!”

Her Highness pulled her shades off. That high confidence her body language displayed was present in her eyes. “Aw… It’s always adorable when you try to give me commands.”

What a condescending comment. All it achieved was Daisy’s muscles tensing and her teeth gritting so loudly she sounded like a furious animal. Matching her grip on Her Highness’s arm, her toes curled to a degree I had never before seen. This was the highest amount of wrinkles this lady had in all this time.

Minh T. poked my side, and I responded, “Someone’s about to get hurt in a second.”

BAM!

Ow… Her Highness’s strength… Not only that, but her speed continued to catch me off-guard. Was my nose broken? My sense of smell seemed to vanish in thin air, and it wasn’t helped by her giant foot crushing my face.

“Tell me, Toadette. Did I request to hear your ‘hilarious’ commentary?”

“N-No! No, Your Highness!” My short message was broken into chunks as I tried to breathe.

Finally, she pulled the foot off of me.

CRACK!!

Wrong! Her foot slammed down a second time! The force could’ve been enough to break my glasses, but my strained screaming was getting loud enough to achieve that. Matters only got worse as her long toenails dug into my face.

For a second time, she got off. But it felt more like she was forced off.

I opened my eyes, and Princess Daisy towered over me. She pointed in the direction of the castle.

“You and the gay Toad start getting this operation in order. Peach and I will be busy for a bit.”

Her Highness sighed. “Oh goodness. Here we go again.”

I never thought Minh T. would be the one to drag me away from a dangerous event. When we got to a garden path far from the royals, she fell to her knees, hyperventilating. Her pupils were smaller, and her hands clasped over her mouth.

Before I could check on her, she sprung up to rub my face. “Are you okay, Toadette?”

“Let’s just grab Penelope.” I brushed her off, leading us into the mighty structure.

“Her Highness always looks happy on TV and in the mags,” she continued. “Aside from when Bowser’s the subject, I’ve never seen her act with so much… anger.”

Poor Minh T., still stuck in that mindset of worshipping a figure because of their status. I was the same at a point. After all, Her Highness seemed like a perfect role model for a growing little girl like myself. It’s a shame that my illusion of the Mushroom Kingdom being a utopia was shattered on my 13th birthday. A quick introduction to the grimy aspects of Toad Town showed me that Her Highness wasn’t the perfect angel she appears as to the public.

Even with this knowledge, I was still lucky to be working under her. Although she labelled me a slave, at least I wasn’t working for someone like Bowser. Babysitting Penelope was ten times more fun than what those dreaded Koopalings could terrorise me with.

After Minh T. and I dragged Penelope outside, I put the first phase of my plan into motion.

“JUMPING JACKS! GO!”

At my command, Penelope got to work flapping up and down like a bird. She didn’t have all-star athletic prowess but cut her some slack. Without any school, meaning no gym, who could fault her for lacking strength?

The important thing was how her pale skin started to turn shiny. See, these Shy Guys only had one apparent weakness: feet. Stinky feet proved to be an instant knock-out gas for two of them, though one put up more of a struggle against me. But if we had eight very smelly feet on our side, imagine the outcome.

And this tennis court served as a good training ground. The blue one had the hardest floor of the three basic courts I scoped. Penelope and Minh T. slipping was the last thing I worried about.

Speaking of Minh T., this dope put on a pathetic display. One jumping jack for every 20 seconds?

“Would it kill you to work out for once in your life?” I groaned.

“If you want me to sweat so bad, just let me sit out in this hot sun.”

Clearly, the girl needed some motivation. I began to slip my shoe off yet halted halfway. That strategy wasn’t good enough. She needed a solid threat.

“You can start jumping, or I’ll walk through town broadcasting your foot obsession to everyone.”

She threw her hands up. “You wouldn’t dare!”

“Try me.”

That lit a fire under her butt. Now she was matching Penelope in pacing. Intimidation is a valuable tool when used appropriately.

Would I really share her secret with the public like that? No, but she had reason to believe I would. Unlike her, I’d never been a goodie-two-shoes about keeping secrets. Sorry, promises be damned. I gotta jump on opportunities when I can.

Penelope went for an extra 50 seconds before hitting the ground. “I feel heavier…”

That got a smile out of me. “Then that means you’re getting stronger, too.”

“How come you’re not doing any of this?” Penelope asked.

“Good question!” Minh T. panted through her exercising.

Well, the truth was that I didn’t need the exercise. My body was gonna get sweaty regardless of whether or not I worked out along with these two. In addition, all this stress from imagining the potential obstacles we’d face was forcing enough water out my body.

“Four laps, girls. And… GO!”

For the second exercise, the kid zoomed off like she downed dozens of candy. She left Minh T. in the dust. Of course, this lazybones wasn’t running, instead walking in this heavy heat.

While the two completed their laps around this spacious tennis court, my toes were dying for some fresh air. A little progress check wouldn’t hurt. Off popped my shoe, and I bent to smell my foot. Just a little sniff.

“Eck!”

Back in its prison, the foot went. Holy cow, the funk wasn’t quite as bad as when we were in the ruins, but it was on its way. Let’s try to keep these shoes on for the rest of the day.

By the time Penelope finished, six minutes had passed. For a little girl running what seemed like three-fourths of a mile, she had some skill! Heh, she’d make a good exercise partner if she wanted.

“Should we check the smell?” she asked, removing her sneaker without an answer.

I plugged my nose. “No! You don’t wanna lose that smell, okay?”

Phew, I dodged a bullet there. All this heat turned the girl into a cooked chicken. Even though the bottom of her foot never crossed my sight, I knew deep down that it was as red as a cherry. Gross to have in your face but effective as a combat weapon.

As Penelope just finished doing some push-ups, sit-ups and squats, Minh T. slumped past me for the fourth and final time.

“My body isn’t built to handle this abuse!” she cried out.

“Tell me about it,” I scoffed. “You can ride someone for hours, but a little running hurts like Hell.”

Her voice cracked. “At least I’m sitting or lying with a dick in me, Toadette! Not doing a triathlon across the kingdom.”

I told her to listen to her crazy self as she gulped cold water down. She and Penelope sat at one of the circular tables under the shade. Meanwhile, I was flat on the concrete doing bicycle kicks.

“So, what makes YOUR feet smell so awful, Miss Toadette?”

Way to be blunt about it. I was still kind enough to answer the kid’s question.

“First of all, I work hard. Second, blame genetics. Stupid doctors say I sweat more than other Toads, yet they can’t or won’t give a reason why.”

Minh T. kicked her flip-flops off and slammed her feet on the table. Through the ridges of the table, it was clear that the splotches of dirt on her soles were fading. Excellent. It only meant that the sweat level was high.

“She’s right,” the Toad said. “First time I went to a pool with her, I thought she jumped in ‘fore us all. Turns out she was a natural fountain of sweat, leaking gallons of the stuff like a soda dispenser.”

“Don’t tell her that!” I shrieked.

But Penelope was already laughing. “So, can you bathe with your own sweat? HAVE you?”

“One time, my mom bought doughnuts, and they weren’t glazed,” Minh T. wheezed. “So, I tell her ‘Toadette nos ayuda’ and rub her forehead all over my doughnut. And it’s shinier than when you normally buy them!”

I should’ve really kept my mouth shut. Just add these to the pile of sweat-related jokes I got over the years.

“You look like you ran a marathon.”

And there was the princess herself, barefoot and still in her swimming attire. The big difference, and this made my heart freeze, was a bruise on her left shoulder. The bright red could only mean that it was fresh.

“Tell me you’ve got all these details planned from A to Z, Toadette.”

“Is A to L close enough?”

She trotted to the chair closest to me, setting her dirty feet on my cap. “For now, I don’t got many other choices. Give us a little rundown, okay?”

While the princess rubbed her rough feet on me, I gave a thorough explanation of how we would handle our entrance into the base of the Shy Guys.

“Neat. I can whip up a pair of smelly feet in a half-hour,” the princess smiled.

I pushed her feet off me. “But as soon as we’re in there, you gotta keep your shoes off.”

“Why?”

“I don’t think you can pop sneakers off like flats or flip-flops.”

Penelope would need to follow the same advice. Sneakers were mandatory for both humans due to the Toad Town Tunnels. Even though neither Minh T. nor I enjoyed chilly temperatures, we could wear whatever light footwear we wanted through the sewers. See? Being a Toad has its benefits.

“By the way,” the princess added, “If we’re talking about practise, how about we give each and every one of us a long tickling?”

“Nope!” I shut the idea down immediately.

“It’ll help numb us a little bit. Come on, you gonna chicken out on that?”

“I’ll be fine,” I insisted.

Although I declined to get my feet tickled, Minh T. and Penelope stepped right up.

As the sun fell upon the domain, the four of us approached the powerful pipe’s mouth. And no, we did not forget the hammers this time. Those blocks were coming down for good this time.

I came in my flats, whereas the two royals arrived in winter clothing and sneakers. Everything was as planned so far, except for Minh T.

“Where are your shoes!?” I groaned.

“You didn’t notice me walking here barefoot the whole time?” she said. “Besides, I ain’t gonna freeze down there. You forget I lived in Mushroom City.”

Speaking of freezing, I turned my attention to the crowned princess herself.

“Don’t YOU freeze up on me again.”

“No promises. You just focus on getting us to the end quicker, shorty.”

Easy enough. It wasn’t like the tunnels changed one bit from when we last passed through them. Frigid, putrid, ugly, all its traits still applied to this walk. Only now I had two more people to care for, and one was a little girl.

“Why do you know this place so well?” Penelope asked.

“Shortcut pipes~,” Minh T. sang. “Not always the most reliable, but when they work, it’s better than catching a flight.”

“Mother always said she’d let me fly, but I’m waiting for that—”

My grip on the hammer tightened. “Can your mom be an actual mom for once!?”

There was dead silence aside from the sloshing of feet in sewer water for three seconds.

“Sorry,” I sighed. “But what does your mom actually do WITH you?”

As I led us deeper, I felt intense regret for my outburst. Please understand that up to now, I’ve been more like a mother to Penelope than Her Highness. I’ve tried to entertain her, I’ve listened to what she has to say, and I’ve just let her be like a kid. Somewhat.

While Penelope stayed silent, Princess Daisy responded to me. “She leaves Penny herself most the time, and then Peach gets mad when she makes mistakes.”

Yeah, that was the reason I was even assigned to be this kid’s permanent babysitter. All because Penelope was carelessly getting robbed every day in Toad Town. Perhaps my mom was too constricting of me. But I always believed an overprotective parent beat an uncaring parent any day of the week.

“How old are you, actually?” I asked Penelope. “Seven?”

“Ten…” she mumbled.

Ah, back to the blocks. They towered us once again. This time, however, we were well-equipped. Minh T. took the first heave backwards, then swung with all her might.

BOOM!

A lightning-like crack penetrated the block’s surface, but more blocks required to be demolished before this wall fell. It was like a musical rhythm. Whenever I hit a block, Minh T. prepared her next swing. As all her weight shifted forward, I’d retract my hammer.

“Isn’t this nostalgic?” I chuckled, lightly coughing in this cold.

“Look, it ain’t as bad as having lava under our feet.”

While we laughed, we overheard the princess calling us the Super Toad Sisters. It wasn’t too off from reality. Since we became friends, our bond was as tight as two loving siblings. We played with each other, we laughed, we had our petty squabbles. Hell, we were sisters in everything but blood. And that makes her desire to do dirty things with me all the more disturbing, actually.

As those incestuous thoughts ran in my mind, Minh T. went flat on her back. Panting, she kicked at the block.

“If you’re tired, you can give the princess your hammer,” I gasped. “Don’t break your feet.”

“Block’s weak enough. This’ll only take a few more minutes. Come on, you gotta keep some of your arm power, Toadette.”

I hated to admit it, but she was absolutely right. Feet may be the weakness of Shy Guys, but being able to handle them with melee shouldn’t have been ignored. So, I plopped next to her, and together we kicked at a single block. She used her bare feet, and I used my flats.

My strikes sounded hard as you could expect. Like banging your fist on a table. Meanwhile, Minh T. sounded like she was hitting a pillow.

She giggled. “If you were more into feet stuff, we could totally do a double footjob. Look at those legs go!”

“Don’t get any ideas like that. You’ll save yourself the disappointment.”

“You get feet in your face every day now,” Minh T. sighed. “One way or another, you’ll see what I see in ‘em.”

Come on, Toadette. You can’t think of a witty comeback?

CRACK!

Whoa, the block just crumbled into pieces. And following its destruction, a black dropped from above, shattering into chunks. I pulled Minh T. back as the domino effect formed a frigid cloud of dust and pulverised stone.

Choking in the stuff, Minh T. exclaimed, “I broke it first!”

“About time,” Daisy cheered. “I’m gonna teach these Shy Guys a thing or two about respect.”

Inside the new room, there was nothing along the sides. It looked no different from every other room in this sewer. Yet in the middle was a firm, red pipe shooting up for what could’ve been miles. Due to the minimal flickering lights, it was impossible to tell if it turned at any point. And looking up in the tube proved fruitless, as it was pitch black.

“What the hell is it gonna be like up there?” I huffed.

“Only one way to find out.” The princess pushed me to the side, jumping into the pipe. Up, she went.

I turned to the remaining two. “As soon as you come out that pipe, swing in ALL directions.”

Although I didn’t see a nod, two distinct pipe sounds indicated they’d made the jump. In my isolation, I recited a brief prayer to the Star Spirits. As much as I didn’t put stock in their powers or care for people, this prayer helped to ready my body. With my nerves calm, I let the pipe suck me up.

Flowing in the pipe for the next three minutes made my back hurt. This thing was a deathtrap, let me tell you something. Most pipes are built to stretch upon detecting a person’s size. Yet this dark pipe not only refused to alter its form, but it was only barely wider than myself. And of the four of us, I’m the skinniest!

The only saving grace was that the tube was lubed. If it weren’t for that, my cap would be slowly ripped for three whole minutes. The pipe went straight for one minute, twisted left for another, and then continued upwards.

POP!

Slumping out the warp pipe, I forgot my own advice. “How are you guys feeling?”

“Worst pipe I’ve ever travelled through, hands-down!” Minh T. whined, fluffing her hair.

This room was tiny. The only thing of note was some orange toy box pushed against the wall and that every wall was a different colour. In front of the toy box was a golden and red spring. Coming from a non-artist, these colours were so ugly mixed together.

The princess shuffled her feet around the tight space, shaking her head. “Don’t tell me this is all there is.”

“Well, I can tell you we’re in the right place,” I said, pointing to two crooked windows. The only building on this street with such an obvious defect: the yellow “abandoned” building.

Yet this room was doorless. As much as I wanted to keep the princess excited in finding her stuff, we had nothing to go on.

I turned to Minh T. “You were hit by that Shy Guy raid in the past, right? You remember anything specific?”

“They hopped around in my garden, Mario gave ‘em head injuries, and that was it. You know he’s not the talkative type.”

“Damn…”

While we three adults thought of something, perhaps another place the Shy Guys could be hiding, Penelope was stomping on the golden spring.

“Get off that thing before you hit your head on the ceiling,” I warned. This was shorter than your average one-floor building.

“Thanks for caring, Miss Toadette, but sometimes you worry too much.”

I frowned. “Off. Now.”

“Is it a crime to have a little FUN—”

BOING!!

What in the world!? Penelope shrunk! And the… the toy box swallowed her whole! As the spring tightened again, the lid shut with a POOMPH.

We seemed to find the Shy Guy’s base after all! A magical toy box, who would’ve guessed that? These goons were never known for their magic capabilities.

Daisy’s face of disappointment switched to a big smile. “We’ve got those suckers now! What’cha waiting for?”

Vaulting onto the spring, another BOING brought her into the toy box. Minh T. and I looked at each other, and all we could do was let out a nervous chuckle. Of all the strange stuff we did in the past, this was very out there.

“After you,” I insisted, pushing her to the spring.

She pulled me back in front of the toy box. “Nah, nah! You’re stronger, so you go first.”

Ultimately, we held our hands in the middle. My right foot pushed down on the spring, and her bare left foot reciprocated the action. It took two seconds, but the toy box came to life! The spring threw us into this mysterious toy box.