My So-Called Perfunctory Existence

Making New Friends is Fun! OR How I Spent this Weekend

12 college kids (mostly guys). 6 coolers of
beer. 7 packs of cigarettes. 3 oversized
boxes of fireworks. 2 paddleboats stolen off
the beach. 1 free-floating raft. What better way
to be socialable than putting all of this
together? Not to mention not a one of my
companions was sober. You know it's going
to be a fun night when the first fireworks go off
like this: "I don't know what this is. Let's light
it on fire!...Oh wow that's a nice AH! RUN!!!!!"

"Everyone stand back while I celebrate
freedom!"-Tom

Someone had the bright idea to paddle out to
the raft and set the explosives off there after
we had set fire to the beach three times and to
the neighbor's driveway. (Hey it was pitch
black! And how were we supposed to know
that the launch pad we created would fall apart
within seconds?)This only lead to a duel
between the boats, shooting fireworks at each
other over the cries of "No! My beer fell in the
water!"

That was Saturday night.

Sunday, John came up to the lake and was
almost consequently killed by my uncle as he
hurdled off the back of the boat at break neck
speed. Gee thanks Uncle Jim, everytime you
meet someone I know, you try to kill them.

Don't ya just love family?

Anyways to avoid detailing, everything was fun
this weekend. Whatever. Sono stanca.