My True Soul

Sickness & Boring Rants about Tradition

I'm on the verge of being really sick. I have slowly felt worse over the weekend. Thursday night was the jamboree for Football, I didn't go. I had always thought I would, but this just wasn't the typical jamboree, for one we played a totally different team than we ever do play and it wasn't even close to home. That kinda sucks since it's my senior year and I do kinda like watching our football team. But hey, we won, so at least we will have one thing this year. The next game is the season-opener, which has ALWAYS been played against LHS on a Thursday night at 7 p.m. for as long as I can remember and as long as my parents can remember. But guess what, not this year. That also sucks. Maybe it's a minor thing, but it was tradition and it seems every year the school changes something starting with my class. Oh well though, it doesn't matter. This is my senior year though, right? Everyone is like "oh I bet it is great." It is, it's nice to finally be a senior, but there are a lotta things that you have to do that I guess aren't thought of. I have college applications out the wazoo, deadlines for them, for scholarships, things to fill out, essays to write, plus I have Chemistry, Physics, Adv. Math or Pre-Calculus, and AP English along with a class to help me study for the ACT. While I also need to earn money. I finally, I think, have decided on the places I'm going to apply to. Which in itself feels really weird. U of Alabama, Auburn U, U of Tenn at Knoxville and at Chattanooga, Washington State U, Eastern Washington State U, U of Idaho, Brown U, Stephen F. Austin State U, East Tenn. State U, Georgia Southern U, Angelo State U, and one more. 2 in AL, 3 in Tenn, 2 in Texas, 1 in RI, 2 in Wash., 1 in ID, and 1 in Georgia. There's one that looks interesting, but it's in Miss. and it'll be really really hot there and humid. I don't think I could take it... the weather there is just... it makes me feel miserable. Plus it's a small southern Miss. city. Do you realize what it'd be like to live there and be a lesbian? As bad as it is here if not worse. I really wanna go some place where it'll be more accepted. Not only for my sake, but for the sake of Sarah if she ever comes to visit or whatever. I think if anyone ever called her something offensive I'd really hurt them... it already makes me mad the ones that have... but I can't fly or extend my arms that far or they'd be in trouble. So yeah... say whatever you want about me, I don't care, but don't say anything about her. I've pretty much always been like that with her, even before I knew I liked her for more than a friend. Heh, lol. I don't think I'm too over-protective tho? Anyway I'm thinking about applying to another one instate. Because I know I'll definitely be able to go to it. I need to start downloading Applications and sending off for them this week. Then this weekend, guess what? Yep, I'll be filling them out and planning on which teachers to ask to fill stuff out for me and to write recommendations. And also starting my damned essay for UTK.
Other than this stuff, what have I been doing? Oh yeah, that's right... Founder's Day was this weekend. It was pretty cool Friday night, the parade and all. The stuff after was good, but I really had more fun last year. I think it had to do with the fact I wasn't sick, I was excited, and It didn't take 2 breaths of air for you to fill like you got enough oxygen. The stuff Saturday, I didn't really feel like going to it. Well, Saturday night, yes. They had fireworks, but of course it started raining. My highlight for the day was talking to Sarah. Everytime I talk to her, I realize how I love her. I'm really really sorry about what happened on the ferris wheel btw, I just hope you start healing very quickly. I want to be there with her... it's less than a year now before I see her. I have some more thoughts in my head, good things about the future, but I think I should probably keep them in my head for the time.
I watched Monty Python and the Holy Grail this weekend. I know, stupid movie, but... something about it just strikes me as funny. I like Brave Sir Robin, lol. And the french guy. I can rant like the French guy does... nonstop, inserting adjectives to describe them that are funny but that fit... I don't do it often, but when I do, my friends find it to be funny. I also watched A Walk to Remember this weekend. Very very good movie. One of my favorite parts is when they talk about being scared of not being together... can relate. So many people are scared of making a commitment and I was one... but now, the thought of not being with Sarah scares me so much worse. My friend Carmel says I'm a traitor, lol. She and I would talk about how we didn't like mushy stuff, didn't wanna get married, everything like that... now look at me, lol. I wouldn't go back though.
Oh, this is something I think is really cool. I've been planning to go Northwest after graduation for a while now and definitely now because for some reason I want to at least hug the love of my life. My friends and I have been talking about how we should go on a senior trip. Well, my friends and I are all pretty diverse. We have trouble agreeing on stuff sometimes. Well, we decided we didn't wanna go to any of the typical places for most seniors to go. Don't wanna go hang out with all the same people we see at school everyday. So it was suggested that we go to Montana... I think, that's where we're gonna go for sure. I've been planning to go to Washington State by driving through Montana and I've wanted so badly to spend some time there... well if I go with my friends, I can spend some time there. Stay a little after them and go on to Washington State to see Sarah hopefully, then come back home. It sounds like a plan at least. We're supposed to start planning it now so it won't be a spur of the moment kinda thing. Hopefully it'll all work out.
Other than this stuff... oh yeah... things with my friends... nothing new really. Amanda's hiding things from us again, big whoop. I really don't care. I like to know just because it is amusing to talk about when you get bored. But gosh, I must go to bed now. I am sneezing, sniffling, and my eyes are watering. I feel horrible.