Varying Shades of Gray - My Life

01-10-03

Ummm......Okay.

I was over at JMC's last night. He has had a migraine headache for about two days. His mom was at work. She was chedule to work until 1:00am. that's why I was very surprised when she walked aroun 10:00-10:30pm.
I immediately sensed that something was wrong by the look on her face. JMC was laying down in his bedroom, while she talked to me in the living room, for a few minutes.
The police found his dad's body, late the night before/early yesterday morning. From what I gathered from what his mom said, he'd been dead a few days. Though it is still being investigated and they are awaitng the autopsy report, it looks like he died of natural causes.
Whne his mom told him that his dad was dead, There really was not any reaction. He just wanted to lay down again, and try to get rid of his headache. I was/he had been chatting with BOH, to that point.
JMC's mom asked if I would stay, to help keep an eye on him. Naturally, I agreed. A few minutes later, I think it started to sink in, to him. e had some tears and asked if I'd just hold him.
He's still sleeping, right now. Last night while talking to me, he said that he didn't know how he felt. Which is perfectly understandable in the situation and given their history. He said he was glad. that he hated the man. Another part of him was really sad too, because that was his dad. But then he said, "..even though he never acted like a dad to me."
Honestly, I'm not sure how to feel, either. I had only met/seen the man twice and both those times were not under good circumstances. As a matter of fact, both times, I wanted to beat the s**t out of him. And that was BEFORE, all of this came out about what he had done to JMC as a child. A part of me is relieved, that he gone and will never be able to harm JMC, again. but at the same time, a part of me is hurting. Not for him, for JMC.
JMC said something last night, that I was feeling. He felt kinda gulity for wishing his dad dead, in the past. In a way, I do too. I am not sure how I feeling, though. My concern right now, is JMC.
Sorry, I can't write about that anymore, right now.


On the other hand, BOH seemed to be doing okay, last night. Just when I do not think that he can get any sweeter, he manages to. :) It's really nothing grand or spectacular that he does. It's just him, being himself. :) He's a smart, sweet and witty young man who always manages to bring a smile to my face. To our faces. :)He really is an angel in our lives.

I also talked to COH, last night for awhile. She was in a pretty good mood, too. She's really sweet. She sent me something that was really sweet. A "Guardian Angel" e-card. Something like that. It was really sweet.

I got to chat with JJ last night for a bit also. We hadn't seen him in awhile, since right around Christmas. He was doing good, also, which I am happy for.

I feel bad for cutting my chat with BOH short, last night. :( I was also chatting with Lil D for awhile, just before we got the news. I ended up cutting it short with her, too. :( I feel bad, but I am sure that they will understand.

I haven't heard from DA since Wednesday. Of course I wasn't at home, so he may have called. if so, I hope he left a message. (makes a mental note to at least to go by the house to check the answering machine.)
Happy Birthday, DA. :) I was planning on taking him to dinner for his birthday, this evening. I'm going to still try. A big part of that will depend on JMC and how he's coping.
Well, so far so good with this computer of JMC's. He'd been having troubles with it. With JC's email help, I *THINK* we have solved some of the biggest issues with this thing.

Well, I will close for now. Have a good day, all.