My Life on a Plate

Quackers

I admit to being a bit of a pessimist, my sister received my share of optimism. Mind you, it has its advantages at times. If she sees something blue in the distance, it's a peacock; she's disappointed when she discovers it's just a piece of blue fabric tangled in a hedge. If I see something ahead in the road it's a dead animal; I get to feel relieved when I discover it's only an old sack. But on the whole it takes effort to not be like Eeyore every day; maybe it's part of a creative nature. We see the dark as well as the light.

I was shattered yesterday so went to bed slightly earlier than usual. Tossed and turned for a while worrying about plane crashes, deep vein thrombosis, my parent's taking ill while we're away - the usual cheerful stuff you know. The brass band on the other pillow started up (Where will I sleep in Rhodes when this happens? The bath? The shower? The corridor?) so I moved to the spare room.

My dreams make me wonder if it's actually wacky backy I smoke or if I'm just cracked. First off I was walking a new dog, name of Buster, and worrying who was going to take care of him while we're away. Think this came about after looking at photos of Daryl's new pup, except mine was a ruddy great Doberman and his is a tiny Daschund. Next I was sitting in a theatre when an air hostess came in and announced our plane was due to leave in five minutes. I realised I hadn't packed any shoes and needed to finish the ironing. There followed a long period of tearing round like a blue-arsed fly trying to find and sort everything out, knowing the plane had probably already taken off. Why such an organised person as myself has these sort of chaotic dreams I don't know. Lack of confidence maybe? Anyway, I woke up shattered.

Then realised in the half light that there are a couple of birthdays during the week we are away. Then it dawned that the Sunday we return is Father's Day. (We land in the wee small hours of Monday) So then I get to worrying about posting cards before we go, from Greece or belated when we return. Others wouldn't give it a thought or even remember, but that's how I am.

I open my eyes and realise I'm in the spare room. The sight that greets me convinces me I'm totally nuts. I'll share it with you. My friends and relatives know I have a passion for ducks and other animals but much as this is true, I don't ask for all the soft toys they give me! Housing them has become a problem. I so wish I was a sane, sensible, mature person. Maybe next life eh?