Each Day Already is a Challenge

Updates

A few folks have asked me about some previous posts.

1) My smashed thumb still isn't healed, no. And the nail still has not dropped off. It finally feels loose, though. So perhaps soon.

2) The boo-boo on my hand (Dec. 7 post, I think) has finally scabbed over. Took a while.

3) Yes, I'm still gaining weight. On one doc appointment last week, I discovered I weigh more now than I have since I was pregnant 23 years ago. I weigh more than I did when I had such horrible reactions to the pain management/injections for my back years ago. (Except then my face was so swelled up I looked like a pumpkin.) The good news, though, is that yesterday one of my docs informed me that one of the meds I take causes weight gain. He's weaning me off that to see if it helps. Hopefully. None of my clothes fit! That med is one that hubbo takes too, so that could be why his weight loss stalled.

If I don't seem as "sunny" as I usually am, I think it's partially because I've been struggling with the fact that my son and his girlfriend have broken up. My son was the one who decided that they should see other people and become more healthy and whole apart before finding out if they should continue with a lifetime commitment. I understand that. He is only 22 and she's 21. But she's hurting and talking to me about her pain. And I'm in the middle, understanding both of their struggles and pain. And I'm feeling my own pain. I love Allison like a daughter. Hopefully, no matter what happens with them, Allison and I will be able to continue as friends.

Derek and Allison met online about eight years ago. They helped each other through some tough times. They finally met in person while Derek and I were still in Texas. He took her to her prom. They really hit if off, after corresponding online for so many years.

Then, they were forced into a living together situation. The relationship I was in was a nightmare, and I felt trapped. I called one of my sisters to rescue me, and Derek didn't want to move to Michigan. He also wasn't prepared to live alone in Texas. So he went to live with Allison and her mother in Memphis. And due to other family circumstances, I ended up in a women's shelter in Michigan, then lived with my elderly parents for a while.

When Jim and I married, Allison and Derek moved in with us in Cincinnati. She didn't like it here and after a year, moved back to Memphis. They still had plans for both of them to end up together in Memphis. Then Derek dropped the bomb a few weeks ago that he wanted to break up.

I guess I feel guilty about the way things happened. Perhaps if I had not been forced to leave Texas when I was, their relationship could have developed differently. Or maybe if I had tried harder to help her get to know and like Cincinnati when she was here, she might not have left.

In any case, I miss having her around here. Last year was such fun at Thanksgiving and Christmas. We shared a kitchen without fussing and fighting like some women do.

I haven't even put a Christmas tree up yet. And Jim and I haven't done any Christmas shopping. (That's a money issue.) I've never been one to go out the few days before Christmas to shop. I always had my shopping done by mid-October at the latest.

I guess I'd better get off here and finish cleaning up the house so I can get that tree up. And tomorrow Incurable Romantic plans on taking the day off. He does need to practice playing the cello for the Christmas Eve service at church. But, hopefully, we're going to get all of our shopping done in one quick trip. Remind me not to let things go like this next year!