Dis 'n Dat

Those crazy red coats

If there is one thing that gets me hot and bothered it's handsome, insulting British men.

Let's start with my favorite: Simon Cowell. Look at that thick head of black hair. I could run my fingers through it all day. I get so excited when he says, "What the hell was that?" While I love watching the talented singers, it's so much better to listen to him go on and on about how awful someone is. His honesty is hilarious and attractive. What could be better than that? He makes watching American Idol so worth while. Damn, that is one sexy Brit!!!

Gordon Ramsay: This man takes the art of insulting to a level that I've never seen anyone touch before. It makes me giddy when someone screws up in the kitchen because I know what is coming next..."YOU *@#*!ING DONKEY!!!!" Women want him and men want to be him, after they kill him, that is. He can take you from the depths of despair to the highest summit with just one look. This man melts my butter.

And finally we have: Peter Jones. Peter is the quiet, pretty boy billionaire. He delivers his insults with more tact than the above mentioned. He is so good-looking you almost have to look away. But then he draws you right back in when he explains how ridiculous your invention really is. Intelligent, hot, and rich. Oh yes, the triple threat.

So there you have it. My sick obsession with rude, British men. Whew, I need to go fan myself.