The Never-Ending Ramblings...

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“Hate’s a pretty strong word. You don’t mean it. Don’t say that.”

How can I explain, in the few minutes I have on the phone. Yes I do hate her, but not hate her, hate her. It’s that bottom sliver of hate the sometimes mingles with strong dislike…or I can’t stand.

That’s it. I can’t stand her. Hate really should be reserved for those who have impacted your life in huge negative ways. She’s only thrown heaps of liquid negative-ism on me. Saturated my clothes - that dry and sometimes stain. I swear she laughs when my back is turned.

I am the one who is debilitated by her nasty splashes of destructiveness when she, with the swoop of both arms, slings her heavy bucket in my direction.

But today, only moments ago, I sat, slumped over at the bottom. Not THE BOTTOM, but the bottom of this. It sucked and fear was involved.

But the beauty of the bottom is that it’s, well, the bottom. You either stay there, or you climb up from the bottom.

I took my first step, fingers dug into slippery mud, braced myself for the long haul.

I’m so outta here.