Second Helpings

Monday Observations

After an alcohol free evening last night, then waking earlier and brighter this morning, I made the fatal mistake of embracing the new day with gusto.

I should not have started the day by washing my hair, then heading out in the wind and rain that suddenly arrived from nowhere. I now resemble the scarecrow from the Wizard of Oz, with the added venom of the wicked witch of the west.

I should not have optimistically believed going to the supermarket in smart attire would make me feel any better. The winds whipped up my skirt, rain splattered on my fancy tights and brand new jacket and frankly my dear...who the hell cares what you look like when pushing a trolley down the supermarket aisles?

I should not have hoped my new burgandy shoes which came under the description of 'Footglove,' would make friends with my feet. Footglove my foot. If you enjoy wearing something as comfortable as barbed wire combined with a brillo pad in a paedriatric straight jacket then I have just the thing. Off my feet now thankfully and not likely to get near them again for a long, long while.

I should not have gone outside on return to feed the birds, then noticed one had left a large thank you note on my kitchen window. Wiping it off outside confirmed the insides also needed cleaning as do the curtains. After standing on stools and kitchen surfaces to take them down, I was shocked and horrified by the amount of grime, dirt, dust, cobwebs and crap on the window frames, curtain rails and walls, so set about cleaning them in my best clothes. By which time it was dark.

I should try to stick to my no boozing, early rising routine, but after today I say sod it. I think I'm better off spending my days as a slob and my nights emptying glasses. Old habits die hard it's true; but new ones are just too painful and too much trouble to be bothered with. I predict Tuesday will start with a hangover and a resolve to break these old habits again.

But tomorrow is another day and who knows how many birds will have s*** on my windows in an effort to keep me busy. Life is full of surprises but I often wish it wasn't.