My Musings, not always daily

June 9th An eye opener

I went to see the Dr with my dad, who just finished his first round of both chemo/radiation. My take on the progression of things was very positive up to this point. I was told (by my parents and sisters) that at the end of treatment, there would be a follow up CAT scan. The next step would be surgery to remove the tumor and voila all would be well. HELLO? I wasn't at the doctor's office for this conversation so I heard just what I was told. I don't know what planet I was on when this discussion was going on, but as usual I didn't ask the right questions.This time I did. I found out that the options for surgery were a long recovery with risks and possible complications. The alternate was no surgery, another round of CHMO/RDTN and in a few moths or more, the end..


All that being said, I haven't put in the GOD factor and that He has a plan, we just don't know it yet. I rely on the fact that He is in control of all this, but we have to make a decision about which road to take.


My father was a minister for many years and I learned from my parents example that in all situations you ask God's will and wait for an answer. It is easier said than done when it is your parent.


I know that my dad is in God's hands, and even though I sit here with tears in my eyes, I am wondering why I am so emotional? I know that to leave this world is just a step into a place without pain, worry, tears, or sadness of any kind. I wouldn't wish him to stay here longer than what is necessary because the hope of heaven is so wonderful, who would want to stay here given that choice? I sure know if it was my decision, everything here is taken care of, my bags are packed and I am ready to go. Get me roses while I am here and not after I am gone.


May God give me strenght to help my parents make the right decision and the grace to carry me through no matter what it is.