Down the Rabbit Hole

Melanie

It has been weeks and weeks since I last made an entry. It seemed I have let far less important things consume my free time. There is so much I should be writing about; committing the memories of my first pregnancy to electronic ink, continuing to pursue publication fueled by recent acceptances...and just keeping current. I just fail to do it for a mirade of silly reasons. Today though, I turn to this blog with a heavy heart and it seems I need the kind of comfort and release that only writing can bring me. On the heels of a warm night of birthday fun and celebration with my family, I received news that my cousin Melanie is back in the hospital. The cancerous growth that was in her skull has begun spreading into her brain, the worst possible prognosis for her young body. My cousin Melanie is a beautiful thirty year old mother of three. She has a wonderful soul and an animated and infectious laugh that fills the room and lifts the spirit. She is the embodiment of faith and strength. I am always surprised by her ability to remain positive, by her unabashed displays of love and affection for her family, even her cousins who visit her far less often then we should. I think about her constantly and I am deeply saddened by the though of how her babies must feel, of their fear and their confusion. Melanie has spent the majority of the last two years in and out of hospitals. She has watched perfect summer days slip by her bedroom windows and monitored holidays with her kids from hospital room telephone lines. She has never complained. A few months ago their was a message on my machine. Mel had found out about my pregnancy and she had called, her voice ripe with happiness and excitement, to congratulate us. In the midst of everything she is dealing with, she did not hesitate to share in our joy. We all pray everyday that the new drugs and treatments will work this time. We all ache to see her on her feet, playing with her kids, planning her much put off wedding.