Second Helpings

It Never Rains But it Pours

As usual when you think things can't get any worse, they do. Apologies for yet another whine but my rope is just about at its end.

Still no news from the hospital on the virus front or Dad's discharge. Problem upon problem rear their ugly heads as we try to sort out his home, arrangements with social services and a very uncertain future. I have not been able to see him in hospital for a week now and am concerned about his care, needs and probable confusion over all this.

But in the meantime, my daughter-in-law's helper is away on holiday and she has been forced to stay at home caring for her two children. Difficult I know, particularly when you're disabled and can't get out, but as we all know life is hard and children are demanding. But it seems our inability to help out and take the children off her hands has been enough for her to post a comment on Facebook for all to see condemning her family here in England. In short, she has to do everything herself, family do not help and she wishes she had never married and come to England. Family in Cambodia would be helping her out and life would be hunkydory no doubt. I notice she can spell four letter words perfectly.

Shortly after posting what I consider extremely hurtful words after all we have done for them, she then phoned to ask for a loan of £1000 to help pay for her mother's hospital fees. Considering the chaotic visit to Cambodia nearly two years ago when she claimed her mother was at death's door, it doesn't ring true and I have to question why her family's needs are our concern. We do not have access to such funds and even if we had why does she think it reasonable for us to loan the money for total strangers? I can make allowances for cultural differences but it has to work two ways.

They came over this afternoon and I tried to diplomatically discuss the fact we are not a personal banking, child minding company and would prefer it if she did not express family matters with foul language on the internet. Her response? We do not understand or care, she is the hard done to one and she'll post what she wants on Facebook. She then stalked out of the house, then spent the rest of the day ignoring us in a sulk, while I entertained her kids.

I have tried. Tried and tried to take all this on board and deal with it. I love my son and hope to never fall out with him. I have told them if they feel they'd be happier in Cambodia then they have my blessing to go there. But if it's so bloody marvellous why does she keep on leaving it to go with Westerners? You can take the girl out of Cambodia, but you can't take Cambodia out of the girl.

She has gone home without a word of goodbye or thanks, no apology for what she posted on Facebook or any concern for what we are going through with my father. It seems her first important task was to wipe me, hubby and stepdaughter from her friend's list on Facebook so we can no longer read her accusations and foul language. So childish it's almost funny.

Excuse me. I try to be tolerant and walk those miles in other people's shoes. But it seems I'm surrounded by relatives who think the world revolves around them and their rights and I have none of my own. Am I completely wrong in thinking maybe they have to take responsibility for their choices and actions and whatever happens is not actually all MY fault?

Over and out. I'm not sure how much more I can take, but I just pray that ash cloud won't prevent us from just one week's respite.

Afterthought. Maybe I could be accused of sinking to her level by posting this, but in my defence this is a protected site where I know no family member will gain access and I am only pointing out facts, not condemning, blaming or cursing at those who have bent over backwards for me.