Blogocentric Formulations

Chick-Fil-A and Vacation Update

VACATION UPDATE: Well, our vacation turned more into a stay-cation. As much as I hate that word, it's applicable here. My wife ended up getting really sick the day before we were supposed to leave, and when we woke up the morning of our flight, she could barely drag herself out of bed. It seems that fate had other plans for us, and our trip to Washington, DC was not meant to be on this particular weekend. I decided that since I'd already submitted the vacation request, I was going to keep the days off anyway... for the past two I've been taking care of my wife who is improving thanks to some heavy duty antibiotics, and I plan on staying home Monday and Tuesday as well.


As for the main topic of this blog post, I wanted to talk a little bit about the "Chick-Fila-A Situation." Not sure how many of you are following it, but the restaurant chain's COO, Dan Cathy, was quoted on a radio talk show as saying:

"I think we are inviting God's judgment on our nation when we shake our fist at Him and say, 'We know better than you as to what constitutes a marriage'. I pray God's mercy on our generation that has such a prideful, arrogant attitude to think that we have the audacity to define what marriage is about."

Personally, I don't really care what Cathy thinks about the topic of gay marriage. I don't even really care that Chick-Fil-A, as an organization, has in the past financially donated to organizations which oppose same-sex marriage rights. As I wrote in my most recent Spirituality newsletter, I don't think religion and politics mix when groups or individuals try to push their political agenda on others, but hey, Chick-Fil-A is entitled to support the causes they believe in, just like the rest of us are. It's not like they're refusing to serve customers who "look" gay or some other kind of social injustice... they're just donating to causes they support.

But all that is just background. What really concerns me is the way people are reacting to Cathy's words... on both sides of the issue. The mayor of Boston claimed he would not allow any new Chick-Fil-A restaurants to open in the city unless they changed their social policies. The mayors of Chicago and San Francisco echoed similar sentiments. Mike Huckabee started a Chick-Fil-A appreciation day, designed to counter an organized protest/boycott of the restaurant by marriage equality supporters by encouraging marriage traditionalists to show up and buy something from the restaurant to show their support. Not to be outdone, marriage equality activists are organizing a day for same sex couples to go to the restaurants (some even encourage them to go in drag) and take pictures of themselves kissing cups of water, sauce packets, or other branded items they don't have to pay for. In Northridge, California a Chick-Fil-A restaurant was vandalized with the words, "Tastes Like Hate" spray painted on the exterior of the restaurant in a style similar to the restaurant's popular ads.

Here's what gets me... does anyone see how childish and polarizing this is? Marriage equality advocates are not going to change the mind of traditionalists by staging their "kiss in." Traditionalists are not going to get marriage equality advocates to say, "Oh, wow. 60,000 people showed up to Chick-Fil-A Appreciation Day? I better change my opinion on the issue." It's ridiculous. All of these activity is just lashing out and people expressing their anger over their particular side of the issue. But it does nothing to address the issue and, more importantly, it takes their anger out on the staff of the restaurants, who had nothing to do with Cathy's comments. Directing your anger at the employees of one of their restaurants is like being upset that your baseball team lost a game and screaming at one of the stadium vendors or janitors. They had nothing to do with the issue at hand!

What's more, I think it really portrays everybody in a bad light. Some same sex couples have even come out and said that encouraging gay couples to go to Chick-Fil-A in drag is embarrassing because it identifies homosexual relationships with cross-dressing, and perpetuating the stereotype that all gay couples are flamboyant cross-dressers is just as embarrassing and detrimental as a restaurant making comments against marriage equality. On the other side of the issue, some Christians are ashamed of the fact that people are and continue to use the Christian religion as a basis for encouraging discrimination against others.

At the end of the day, it feels like this battle - like so many others - isn't necessary a battle of large groups of popular opinion against another; it's a battle of extremists of one kind against another, looking around and saying, "If you even kind of believe my point of view, you need to do something outlandish and embarrassing to prove it." I know more than a few people who are caught in the middle... somewhere between standing out in front of a Chick-Fil-A waving a Bible, and going into a Chick-Fil-A in drag to kiss a branded packet of barbecue sauce... are the rest of us. People who may have an opinion one way or another, but who can take a more rational approach of either supporting or not supporting a business with your patronage depending on whether you support their corporate officers and/or corporate culture and politics. People who are embarrassed of confessing their personal beliefs on the issue for fear of being grouped in with these extremists. People like the ones at The Jim Henson Company who, after hearing the comments, considered the options and chose to discontinue licensing Muppet toys for Chick-Fil-A kids' meals, instead donating that money to GLAAD. Not a lot of fanfare or boisterous posturing... just a company that decided they didn't want to be in business with another company after these remarks and quietly went their separate ways.

How great would this world be if everyone else handled things the same way, doing what's best for themselves and in accordance with their own beliefs, without trying to wave all of that in the faces of people who see things differently?