Idjit or Genius, Who Knows?

How do the computers know...?

How do computers know when it's a perfect time to crap out? My desktop, laptop, and then my cell phone all died on the same day. They did this just as I was leaving town, of course, so there was no time to get anything fixed, and I was left incommunicado for days! I'm sure people missed me terribly, but the computers just refused to accept any e-mail while they were broken. I'm pretty sure my voicemail must have been full, too. At least my Kindle kept working, I'd have been close to suicidal without that.

But, I still really want to know how computers know when it's the worst possible time for them to quit. Do we send out some kind of electrical vibration they can intercept? Is there somebody in touch with the computer, always looking through the camera, and recognizing from our body language that we really need things to go smoothly at that juncture? Are computers now self-aware little snots who don't know what's good for them because they CAN be fixed with a fire ax, okay, so they better wise up and get with the program beFORE I HAVE TO COME OVER THERE...

Ahem. Well. Anyway, I think things which behave as if they have a personality might just have one. I wouldn't mind this except the personality always seems to be a rotten one. Have you ever felt that a thing might be sentient because of how wonderfully it works, how it always knows just what you need? No, of course not. They only seem to be sentient when they're snotty little pieces of metal and plastic costing a fortune to get repaired by some some nasty little twelve-year-old who thinks he's so smart, just because I don't like computers, I have never liked computers, I WILL NEVER LIKE...

Where was I? Oh, yes, little Mister Smartypants, I bet his mama wouldn't even miss him, asking me what I did, like it's my fault the lousy thing is now an extremely inconvenient paperweight. So. One of my computers is now fixed, I am back in touch with my adoring public, and able to catch up on this blog, at last. I'm sure you all missed me, but you have to blame it on the computers, really.