Perpetual Ruminations

Sunday

It's Mother's Day and it really gets me missing my own mom. Of course, I miss her all the time, but certain days I miss her more. Even so, I know she is in a far better place, and I know she is happy. It helps knowing this, and that one day I will see her again. Until then I honor her memory and try and make the most of my time left here.

I worked today, and enjoyed the fact that I got to work with my wonderful wife. I'm always surprised how many people stop by to purchase lumber on Sunday. To me, this should be a day spent with family and enjoying life. Of course, I do know that some people have to work on Sunday, like we do. I also know that sometimes people are working on projects on the weekends, and need a little more to finish up. But I'm talking about the person who has to come in and get five or six sheets of sheet rock at five in the afternoon, on a Sunday.

Sure, they may be putting them up, but not likely. Maybe Monday after work? Possibly, but then they could also pick them up on their way home. I know, five sheets of gypsum isn't the best example. but you kind of get my meaning. It's just that there isn't anything pressing that they need to go out and get this stuff, they just don't appreciate the time they have with their family. I see this quite often, and especially notice it on Mother's Day.

Do they really think their wife and the mother of their children enjoys going to a lumber yard for the afternoon. Mom's always enjoy loading AC2 treated lumber instead of going someplace for mothers. Then, there's the real sensitive guy who stops by the fast food joint before shopping for building materials and having his wife help load them. One day a year is given in honor of mothers, and these people can't set aside their projects for one day to spend it making the mother of their children feel pampered? Unbelievable.

It's almost funny, in an ironic way. Because, when Father's Day comes around, the yard traffic is pretty heavy. Their are lots of wives and children coming in with dad to pick up his Father's Day gift. It may be a gun safe, or tools, maybe a new tool box or power tools. It's things he will enjoy and get a lot of use out of, and it's thoughtful on the part of the children and wives. But for Mother's Day, few are picking up things mom will enjoy. Sure there are some who have plants and flowers, a new patio set  they gave her as a gift. But there are many who are getting boards and nails, with nothing at all for the woman beside them.

It's just not right, it shows how one sided many relationships are, and how thoughtless some men are. It gives us guys a bad name, and makes us seem insensitive and uncaring. Of course, we know that's not the case. Well those of us who appreciate and respect our women know this is not the case, but unfortunately we seem to be vastly out numbered. On top of that, one bad apple makes the whole bunch look bad. Luckily for us good guys, our women let us know just how much they enjoy us being the men we are.

It's like there's two general categories, the real tough guy, bad ass, macho man's man, and then the type who are sensitive, caring and what is often refereed to as pussy whipped. It's not the best term, but I would rather be pussy whipped than a man's man. In fact, it should be rephrased as a real ladies man. But, someone already coined that phrase and it has a whole different meaning. But, what doe's the term, "Man's man," mean anyway. It sounds like a male who has a preference for other males to me. Not that I mean any disrespect for anyone who's preference is for same sex. No, I do not intend that at all. But even they would likely be insulted by being called men's men.

OKay, I'll let it go here, before I say something that does offend someone. After all, to each there own, and some women must love these kind of guys, or they wouldn't be with them. To me, I find it better to give respect and admiration to my wife. That's what the foundation of love is after all. I know, most people think love is a feeling, emotional. Not me, I'm not falling for that line. No, love is not what I feel, it's what I think. What I feel may have attracted me to this wonderful woman, but it wasn't love. I learned to love her after I got to know her, after I began to admire her, and after I had learned to respect her as a person. And, since feelings can change many times within a single day, love based on feelings is about as unstable as nitroglycerin on a hot day. But, one's thoughts are very stable, and if love stems from what a person thinks about the other person, then it's stable and secure.