Perpetual Ruminations

Monday

Didn't make it in here at all yesterday. I remembered kind of late last night, and since I had to be up at three this morning, I decided not to stay up any later to write my journal entry. Normally, I would have, but since I've been feeling so miserable and just cannot shake this illness, I thought it better to get sleep than to write.

I hate to phrase it like this, but it's accurate and tells just how I feel, "I'm sick and tired, of feeling sick and tired."

I get feeling better, then I get worse. It's been back and forth for a long time now, and I still have no idea what's wrong, and why it gets better one day, or maybe even one afternoon, then turns worse again that night or the next day. The only thing that makes any sense is allergies, yet that does not fit for everything, either. I believe I have a cold or sinus infection, and the allergies are on top of that, or maybe even the cause of the infection.

Yesterday it was calmer, and I did a lot better, yet today, it's even less of a breeze than yesterday and I'm doing worse again. That's why saying it's allergies doesn't make a lot of sense, either. There just is no consistency as to what makes me feel better and what irritates things. But, I will go to the clinic for a check up and find out if the doctor can figure out what's wrong. Hopefully along with the diagnosis, she will also have some suggestions on what I can do to recover and feel better while I do.

I also hope I feel better better so I can enjoy my two days off, but at the same time, if I'm ding better on Wednesday when I see the doctor, it may make it more difficult for her to diagnose me. Either way, if I can feel better, I'm all for it.