Wondering about my Wanderings

Ponderance

I wonder what it means to be in a state of "ponderance". It has something to do with pondering. My latest pondering is about a woman at work who was becoming a thorn in my side. I spent all weekend getting up the courage to tell her I did not like her calling me names. Not only that I was faced with telling her she could no longer take my food to eat. She had found a way to take advantage of me that made me very uncomfortable. I get to work and find out she has been removed from her post and is headed elsewhere. Part of the pondering pool of sweat is wondering if I would have had the guts to share in a caring way I could not accept her abuse any longer. I discovered today I was not the only one having trouble with her. I end like I started pondering. It is like a pond of sewage being filtered out with the intent that I might learn to happen when I am needing "ponderance' again.