Witness to Withness

Back to Work

There is a goal that needs to be reached
I will do what I can to get there
A shot with intention toward a net of connection
The hope of getting close to winning
The price of greater freedom of self with others

There is someone that summarizes Life as the quest/journey of loving and working. I have no idea who they are, but I think they are on to something. When I know I am loved (valued) and can do someone thing worthwhile (Life filled with meaning) I understand to a greater extent what got me into this world in the first place, a labor of love.

         I did find my way to work place and what better way to do it than to find a job on the campus that I would look forward to going back to. I had worked as a dishwasher just before my illness, now I would work with others on maintenance related issues. It was a tedious proposition. I was not very mechanical. I was on the clumsy side. I recall vividly the people I worked with and worked for. There was a kid by the last name of Paul, who was the son of the psychologist on campus. He was tall with a humorous bent, there was Becky Hubbard and others with her surname, who had a medium build and a big heart and there was a manager that would follow me into another venue several years later. I painted, cleaned grounds, scraped buildings and at what point was trained to run machines to clean floors in the library. One of the persons who trained me in maintenance was from a country in Africa. We had a discussion about mental illness and what it meant in the land he came from. He let me know that it was a very rare occurrence in the place he came from it was something he knew most of all from coming to America. There words stayed with me. I wondered why.

         I had my ups and downs in the various projects that would come my way. I helped paint and that seemed to go well enough. I worked with several other students who were helping fund there education by doing the same work I was doing. At another juncture I scraped a whole building by myself. It was the music building and I recall the noise and the specks before my eyes, the night after I had scraped. It seemed like an endless task that was forever being inspected with people that were over me. I sweated profusely. At times I wondered if I would survive. Eventually a professional crew was sent to do the job. Did I not do a good enough job? Another major project say me painting a chain linked fence silver. It was another arduous task that seemed to last forever. I did the best I could with little guidance. I was taken off that job too and people more suitable were appointed to do the task. After that began my journey into learning the art of maintenance, waxing and buffing floors. I was learning a lot. More than anything else the trials and tribulations that went along with hard work.
         There were many opportunities for respite along the way. I watched as a young woman painted a large colorful mural at the student center. I marveled as I conversed with her during lunch time. I had never been an artistic sort and yet at the same time enjoyed what other could do with their talents. It was exciting to see what she was a able to do over the space of a few months. I do recall her being very attractive and yet nothing happened beyond that. I spent a good time with a janitor who was known by the students as Colonel Sanders. He was a pastor who was the leader of the largest Sunday school class on campus. I enjoyed telling him about my own testimony as he minister with others like me who called forth his attention. I was ennobled by our connection as time to begin school was creeping more and more quickly. My time of doing work at college came to an end two or three weeks before school started. We had a giant cookout with a water balloon fight. One of my Coworkers Becky, talked about how everyone loved me. I left my work situation feeling hopeful. I would not be alone. God was sending me people to do battle with me. I looked forward to having my last meeting with Doctor Fleming in which he would sign papers that bless my return to college.