thoughts, words, deeds

not worth the insulin

Prompt: Who/what is the best cereal mascot, and why are they better than the runner-up?

I don’t eat cereal. It’s not worth the insulin, especially in the morning when waking up produces strange blood glucose readings in the first place. If I’m ever tempted into cereal, it’s usually cereal without a mascot, like granola or cinnamon toast crunch (which we keep in the house because other people besides me potentially eat it).

I don’t watch TV much, so I can’t tell you if there are mascots that are especially good from the memories of their commercials. It always struck me that those commercials were remarkably silly with strange messages. Think Fruity Pebbles (Barney Rubble and Fred Flintstone)—the underlying message being: This cereal leads to obsession and your children will become criminals if you buy it. Or Coco Puffs (that weird bird?): If you eat this cereal, you will become certifiably insane. I always felt sorry for the Trix bunny, and wanted to tell him that they weren’t as good as they looked, the leprechaun from Lucky Charms felt kind of whiny, and Tony the Tiger frustrated me with his insistence that a sugar cereal was good for you.

Ummm, but I’m trying to come up with a best. As a child, I remember liking Count Chocolula, probably because we never convinced the parents that we needed it, so I just remember the picture on the box, not the taste. He can be the runner up. And I kind of thought Snap, Crackle, and Pop were cute, so they get top billing. I don’t eat Rice Krispies, though (they get soggy too quickly and the taste isn’t worth the insulin). Except in marshmallow treats. Now, that may be worth the insulin.