Evolution of Love 2

THE INTENSITY OF THIS FULL EMPTINESS

Author: Could you say more about this sensation you have occasionally referred to, this sensation which is like a caress?

Yolande: This sensation never leaves: it is like something caressing the area around the heart and, at the same time, it is a global sensation. It is permanent. It is there whatever happens in the waking state and forces a division of attention. When I’m busy, or surrounded by people, it can be light, just a presence. When I have nothing to do or when I’m alone and quiet, it takes up more room. And when I relax, it takes over completely.

Author: You say it forces you to divide your attention?

Yolande: This new point of view is always there, this full emptiness, this silence; sometimes it is very intense, and sometimes very gentle, but it is always present. The full emptiness is what sees everything. It sees what seems to be outside: things, people, and all the inner contents: thoughts, feelings, movements of the psyche, before thoughts take shape.

When the silence is very intense, I see things the way they are, without even naming them, for the silence is so total. The tree is not the thought ‘tree’, the perception ‘mountain’ is not filtered by the concept ‘mountain’: everything is sensation, vibration. There can also be moments when things are named but then attention is divided between, on the one hand, the thing that appears and the thought it sparks off, and on the other hand, this seeing that sees. What is named is felt, not thought; it is full of this vibration.

In a quiet setting, where there’s less going on – when there is nothing to do and no one to listen to – all attention turns inward, toward the silence, and the energy experiences that accompany it. More present, more vibrant, more intense, they completely fill the space.

So, everything depends on what life presents me with each moment. And whether it is on an ‘inner’ plane or an ‘outer’ plane, it is this ‘thing’ that does what it wants and has me do what it wants. I don’t decide.