Can We Talk 2

Scary Movie Month

         I really don't like being scared. I don't care for practical jokes. I don't like horror movies. I don't like violence. I'm scared of heights. Life has enough hard moments without seeing them onscreen. But this time of year, it's really hard to find some TV time without scary movie options. At times you just need to read a book with no distractions!

         Horror movies usually follow a formula. Most run of the mill horror movies depend on teenagers or young adults making really stupid decisions. There's usually some gratuitous nudity or sex. For instance, Piranha 3DD, we all know the DD refers to the naked Playboy Bunnies in the pool. There is a tendency to focus on some inanimate object, like an empty rocking chair or a toy. Suspenseful music is essential. I have to tell myself, when I'm stuck in this situation, it's all fake.

         I have some health and focal issues that have affected my balance, In non-horror movies, I get dizzy when the camera pans a room or spins around. I discovered that virtual reality situations make me nauseous. In fact, when I'm sitting at a red light at an intersection, I can't watch cars turning left going by me. I have to focus on the light or something in the distance to avoid nausea and dizziness. Strobe lights pose a threat to me, and I don't want to take risks. So I'm squeamish about horror movies.

         I'm steeling myself up to watch a zombie movie because I met one of the non-zombie actors a few years ago. This movie turned him away from drama and western films to specialize in horror movies, so I am going to make myself watch it. Maybe knowing one of the people pretending will help make it tolerable.

         I know a lot of men and women love horror movies. There is a lot of money to be made in them. I just don't get it. Why? Who needs to be scared or thrilled that way? Yech. Happy fright month to you, if you like it. Every channel features horror this month.

Booo.