Angel Whispers

Cyber Safety

The Internet. Love it or hate it? Many moons ago when rumours were heard that the world wide web would enable us to communicate, chat, share and discover, I for one was suitably impressed and couldn’t wait for it to be launched. To be able to chat with relatives near and far, play games with people from all over the world, research on any subject and discover all the new delights the internet would offer was a mesmerising prospect. I even stated at the time it had the potential for world peace as people learned to respect and understand other cultures, lifestyles and opinions. I knew that was probably not going to happen, but it had possibilities and I wasn’t the only one to voice that opinion.

On a personal level I can state categorically my internet experiences have been mainly positive and have enriched my life. Okay there’s been the occasional rude idiot opponent in a game, a few fraudulent attempts, some annoying posts from people I wouldn’t have expected and disappointment when online friends don’t respond or disappear completely. There’s even been some hassle on WDC at one stage, but ultimately the good far outweighs the bad and nothing has caused any major or lasting damage.

Fast forward. Now I have lost count of how many social media sites there are and would be hard pushed to name them. I scan Facebook daily for news of relatives and friends and have yet to figure out the point and workings of Twitter, but that’s as much as I use social media. There’s a lot of talk and thoughts being expressed lately about the safety of these sites, particularly where children are concerned. There are reports of abuse, bullying, inappropriate photos and topics being readily available and it seems to me the dark side of the internet is dominating.

This is where the differences between reality and the ether become painfully evident. Take age restrictions for one. If an underage person attempts to buy alcohol, cigarettes, drive a car or enter a nightclub they will be challenged and questioned and asked to provide identification as proof. On the Internet age restrictions are a joke. Sites may attempt to suggest a suitable age to join, but no proof is needed and anyone can join by entering a false date of birth and clicking a button. There is no one to check or challenge as far as I know.

Similarly actions and inappropriate behaviour are much easier to get away with online. Assaults, abuse, deceit, lies, stalking and bullying would all result in some form of punishment in the real world. Online it seems anyone can do anything and without any laws or deterrents there are daily reports of the damage done by those who care not about others and have no conscience. Anyone caught committing a crime in the real world should receive a penalty and will have a record. They will not be able to reinvent themselves, block people or make their movements private as is possible online.

It annoys and upsets me the way things seem to be heading on the internet. Admittedly we tend to only hear the bad side in the media and I believe there are still many positive things happening in the ether. But it’s obvious with so many social sites available the problems are escalating. Only last week our news was dominated by a 14 year old girl who had committed suicide and her parents lay the blame at the door of one site. Instagram. Parents and carers cannot be with and control the activities of their children 24 hours a day in reality, so why should they be expected to do that with the internet? I’m sure most parents try to advise and watch out for what their children are doing, but it’s impossible to do so all the time and too much interference leads to youngsters becoming secretive and deceptive.

It’s about time these sites took some blame and control over things. I don’t profess to know how or what can be done, but surely there have to be better ways of securing sites than are observed at present.

I know little about many of these sites and from what I have witnessed have no interest, but when my family become involved in abuse I have to question why people are allowed to do things online they would not get away with in reality. ‘Because they can,’ is the answer I suppose. My son’s estranged wife decided to screen shot his photo, then post it on Instagram with foul and serious allegations against him. It was easy for me to locate, her children to witness and totally inappropriate for anyone to post online. It took a complaint to Instagram before it was removed and later for her to have her account deleted.

My son has an injunction against her which supposedly prevents her communicating with him by phone, text or on social media. Although her actions were not direct communication it necessitated a visit to the police, who agreed the posts were a breach of the injunction and confirmed they would visit her and give a warning. If she does it again she will be arrested and possibly imprisoned. But how can anyone check up on her online activity when she can join any site, under any name then make them private and block people? We have no idea what she does online or what she and any who are reading her posts are capable of. It doesn’t make feeling protected and secure very easy.

We want to be left alone and not be worrying about what she is doing or checking up on her, but there are three innocent children involved here so it’s imperative they are protected. Our wish was that she would accept the end of their relationship, be amenable as regards child care and be part of their lives in the future. Instead we have a situation we can do little about and I too will blame these sloppy social media sites that allow people to post so much inappropriate stuff online. I don’t know what can be done about it, but it’s becoming increasingly obvious some legislation has to be put in place. I’d be interested in your thoughts.