I Blog Poetry and Prose

March 31, 2019

Jamál (Beauty), 11 Bahá (Splendor) 176 B.E. - Sunday, March 31, 2019

Sunday Thougjhts

I feel as if I've wasted the morning, which isn't entirely true. I also feel guilty because I've posted some personal issues on Facebook, which couldn't be helped because its the only way I can contact some of my family members. I suppose I could have waited until Monday, but I was so stress over the problem that I had to do something to relieve the stress, so I posted a poem about the problem. I'm afraid I will be homeless by the end of April, unless I get a little more financial help.

Ever since moving into this apartment in December, my finances have gotten worse. I borrowed money in January and February to relieve the situation, unfortunately that put me deeper into debt. I still owe money on the security deposit, which I was going to pay this month. That's not possible, and I'm short with the rent money as well. I posted about it yesterday. The only response I got from my family concerned food and the promise of gift card to a nearby supermarket. Food isn't the problem. It's weird that the first thing people seem to think is that sending a senior citizen food will solve the financial problem. That isn't always the case.

Living on the Brink of Homelessness1

On this bright Sunday morning,
darkness and hopelessness
surrounds me.

There is a solution
to my problems
which I cannot see
because of the hopeless fog
generated by fear
of what will happen
in the coming month.

Living on a fixed income,
is living on the brink
of homelessness.

At this point,
I need financial assistance
not food,
because food can be received
at food banks.

I could be homeless
before the end of April!

I don't know what's going to happen in April. Maybe the fear of being homeless is unfounded. At this point, I'm tired of the stress. The only way for me to deal with it is to pray and write. I'm saying the Tablet of Ahmad, one of the most powerful prayers revealed by Baha'u'llah. In fact, I've said it so often that I've almost learned it by heart.

A friend responded to the poem. I haven't had a response from anyone else; however, I will check Facebook again today.

Footnotes
1  Posted on Facebook.