%%USERNAME%%    %%ACCWORDS%% %%ONOFF%% |
 |   All that remains: here in my afterlife as a 'mainstream' blogger, with what little I know. |
|
The Idiotic Ideate?? Formerly: New Zenith To Hell…(all started with arc as writer here from the trials of Rising Stars to Preferred Author to WDC Quills Best Poetry Collection to the falling action I feel now that settles in a white case.) Got to hustle to preserve the best of me before fully fading on that virtual horizon glowing more brilliant with each passing day to permanent nuclear winter. if people don’t get it, I don’t need to explain it. We kill all that’s beautiful before we question it’s purpose. So many people find it easier to think in the black and the white. God forbid you get lost straying in the gray. "Whoever fights monsters should see to it…he does not become a monster.” I’ve been to the abyss and back. Not so bad. The loneliest happy person you'd ever meet, when not the saddest person who needs to be alone. In an ever-changing world, we need to handle topics at the ready. If you roll over and give in to the narrative without lending a voice of your own, you might as well hand over your civil liberties. We have voices that should connect to true conscience and spirit for honest and open discourse. Why feel so redacted? Unify on issues and put drama aside. Open minds require complete objectivity. If none need apply, question the unbendable sources for answer. If you knee-jerk react to every issue lurking out there that clutches your neck, you fall victim to your own ignorance born from a life of apathy (no doubt) in pathetic cries of injustice. Just writing what I feel without the narrative-altering mind f---ing with my head. [MY Chorus] In your house, I long to be Room by room, patiently I'll wait for you there, like a stone I'll wait for you there, alone "It amazed me how truth was often suffocated in minutes, but lies were given sufficient air to breathe indefinitely." "You are all better than you think you are, you are just designed not to believe it when you hear it from yourself." ![Merit Badge in Second Time Around Contest
[Click For More Info]
Congratulations on winning the Grand Overall Prize in [Link To Item #2164876] with your beautiful poem, [Link to Book Entry #933358]. This poem really moved me. Great writing!
Rachel *^*Heartv*^*](https://images.Writing.Com/imgs/writing.com/writers/badges/group-Second_Time_Around_Contest-2164963_14.gif)    "...lasting art is never anything more than a mathematical expression of the relations that exist between the internal and the external, the self [le moi] and the world." -Jean Metzinger I'm in love with carefully chosen words, arranged just so, audible, edible, to inhale. I attempt to post new poems and epiphanies daily with some links to what inspires. I am legally blind with a rare, genetic form of glaucoma. I'm described as "end stage" after two successful surgeries, still subject to further vision loss. Cataracts complicating matters. Writing Can get strenuous but seldom deters what yearns to emerge, despite a documented history of depression and recently diagnosed ADHD and undefinable social disorders and/or PTSD. My recent poetry:
Sometimes epiphanies about my insights on writing and life and what goes on... Making sense of life is maddening. Why do I need to know, when truth may not actually exist? Learning to accept would be a better pursuit? Flailing about in my own mediocrity, hoping to bust out. I am visible. You can put a face with a name. I would like to see other writers, too. Fiction is what you write, not who you are. Reinventing myself. I couldn't continue on the path I was on and needed a fresh start. This time around I want to put the focus on writing and the world outside of this community as it affects my life. I realize now that I have been baring my chest a bit more, as when young. fake me much more boring and unliberated than the real me. A world arriving as silent as that blossom in your garden that I told you about... |
If you get a cat that cuddles, hold on to that pet. You would be so lucky, as we were with a cat named Pele.  Pele passed in 2018 after 19 long years, the last was especially miserable. Couldn't tell what was happening, but she felt hollow and light when picked up. She might have been blind, but then would do some of the cutest things. We have a landing in the middle of our split level home below the stairs going to the upper level with the bedrooms and bath. She would carry around a toy or anything she could find like a sock in her mouth. She'd lay it at the landing and cry like she was calling for the other cats to come play. Eventually, the game caught on and the other cats started doing it after she passed, as if carrying on the tradition. One of our remaining two cats who we call 'Buddy' because he's more like a dog than cat, crows before dawn and cries through the house as if he's looking for someone to play with all the time, for no apparent reason.  Our other cat is named 'Mels' which is short for Carmella, which is really acknowledging her predominate fur color appearing like caramel. Though it's also an abbreviate for 'smells' because she's always lifting her head and demonstrably sniffing the air when there is a scent that intrigues. For a short time, Buddy would do the same during these moments and I nicknamed them 'Whiff' and 'Sniff'.    Best Friends, though they have their spats that usually turns into playAfter Pele, I have worked with our two remaining felines to see who wants to be my next lap cat, snuggler. Pele was always on my lap and always good for a hug. With her thick fur and her tender purrs I couldn't feel more contented to have her love. It was sad to see her become a hollow shell of herself, sleeping in her litter box during her last days. I hoped I could carry on her memory with a pet who wanted to snuggle, too.  Mels and Buddy are very skiddish animals when company visits. Buddy has gotten more comfortable with certain guests. Mels just hides under our bed upstairs until everyone is gone, leading us to wonder if she needs anxiety meds. Then, one day she found a friend she liked and would stay in Myles room when they had sleepovers, or get togethers. But my efforts to adapt one of them into a cuddler has failed. You might say 'get a dog.' I can barely take care of myself. {e:laughahhsad?}  Buddy will come when he's called. He will flop on me with his 16 pounds of big boy weight. But, I think he has ADHD or something, because he don't sit still. He won't jump up in a lap of anyone on a chair, but will reach someone's leg with his paw and try rub his face on the furniture. Just not comfortable in a kitchen chair, and only a few moments in a recliner. In bed, he'll flop on my wife and even spoon her! If he were a lion he'd be an awesome bed mate! But, he won't cuddle. Squirms away when I squeeze and he's off to another room like I've offended him, because he's my master, afterall.  Mels is just as quirky. She will allow a little hug and she's so slight that I'm sorry to say there's not enough there to satisfy a lonely boy. She sits on my lap at night and will lay there all night if I don't move. But, I need to move my back and legs so they don't tigethen up and then she's between us at the end of our King size bed. She is less likely to come when called, always pensive and thinks something is up when we want her attention. So, I've basically given up on both. Hugs from humans don't seem as good as Pele's. I miss that cat. So, if you get a cat that snuggles. Hold on to it for as long as you can. 7.17.21  This is our cat Glaeder who died before we got Mels and Buddy. He did not survive his first year, with a rare disease. We'll never know if he was a hugger. He was interested in sitting in my lap when I was on WDC, kneading a spot with those claws, making it hard to concentrate. We all sat together with him as he expired just around midnight 2013, with tears in our eyes. We cried and mourned as a family a tragic end to a promising cat life.** Image ID #1036918 Unavailable ** HOW DO I GET OUT OF THIS BLOG POST?  |
View Portfolio
Visit Notebook
Send Gift Points
Awards
Badges
Send Email
Community Newsfeed
General Discussion
Sponsored Items
Book of Trinkets
Static Items
Books
Groups
Interactive Stories
Audio
Campfire Creatives
Community Notes
Crossword Puzzles
Documents
Folders
Images
In & Outs
Madlibs
Photo Albums
Polls
Product Reviews
Quizzes
Survey Forms
Web Pages
Word Searches
In the Falkland Islands, internet is very limited and very expensive. The place I'm currently staying only lets me use it in the middle of the night, so when I have to get up at 3 am to check my texts (no cell service to the US here unless I'm on the internet) or WdC, I don't do nearly as much as I used to. 
I currently have 2 very long emails I still need to get to from several days ago. Anyway, I miss everyone, but I also miss sleep, so there's that. 
Have you spoken to the doctor about your vision problems lately? I know there are special glasses for it because I have to wear them to read much ever since the brain injury. It's part of why I now only listen to audiobooks instead of reading regular books. It took 8 years for anyone to diagnose it because I have a brain injury and while one might think it would be obvious to me that I see double, it wasn't. Partly, my brain does a fair job of compensating. But also, partly, you use your brain to realize and understand that the 2 images you constantly see are double vision and something you should mention to your eye doctor. Since my brain was damaged, even basic things like that can escape me. 
I never once thought to mention it, even with annual eye exams in the Army and an exam every 2 years at the VA. Though, in my defense, since it happens in something like 41% of people with a brain injury, it should have been discovered by an eye doctor much sooner. 
I know doing that activity is a CRAP TON of work. But you made a difference in lives, not just his, but for all the people he's reviewed since. 
Well done! 
