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 |  My Blog....Pearls of wisdom and/or foolish mutterings.....You be the judge.... |
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A little of this, a dash of that......epic mood swings.......A LOT of foolish mutterings and occasionally a few words of wisdom. It's a crapshoot. You never know what you'll find in here... |
| Holy Cow! Check this out!! ** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** That's the tree in my front yard. It's snowing in Houston. Well, it snowed for about 3 or 4 hours. It's stopped now, but it was beautiful. It may not look like much to most of you, but believe me - for Houston,this is a BIG DEAL. We do not DO snow. We have 11 months of summer. Snow is HUGE! My grandkids were ecstatic. Heck, everyone in town was ecstatic! We were all transformed into little kids. The picture below is earlier in the evening when it first started to snow. Believe me, I wasn't the only one running around taking pictures! ** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** My backyard later in the evening ** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** Now, I'm going to go snuggle up under a pile of blankets and go to sleep. I NEVER get to do that. Ahhhhh!  |
| Time seems to be flying by like a speeding bullet. I can't believe this year is within three weeks of being over. I still haven't gone out to buy a Christmas tree. That is on my list for today. As are many, many other things. I need to make a list. At least if I make a list, I will have a sense of accomplishment as I mark off the things I actually get done today. Yeah, I think I'll do that. A sense of accomplishment is always good, especially when you're feeling overwhelmed. I was so enmeshed in Nano in November that I hardly have any recollection of that entire month. Now I feel as if I'm having to run a marathon to catch up on all the things that went undone in November, in addition to all the things that have to be accomplished in December. I just have to keep reminding myself - hey! You wrote a book in November. That makes me feel better, but I still feel like I've just let everything slide and need to get on top of stuff. There just aren't enough hours in the day. When I lived in Caracas, life moved at a much different pace. The whole place shut down between the hours of 11:00 and 2:00, so even if you wanted to do something like pay bills or shop or go to the bank, you couldn't because everything was closed. No one got in much of a hurry to do anything and every day just seemed to have a leisurely pace to it. None of that rat-race stuff there. I hated it at first, because I was so accustomed to hurry, hurry, hurry and the insane pace of life in the States. But it didn't take me long to become accustomed to it and then I loved it. I remember vowing that I would not allow myself to get caught up in the "rat-race" again when we returned to the States. You can probably guess how long that vow lasted once we came back home. Not long at all, because here, if you stand still for too long or move too slowly, you get run over. And it's hard to get back up. So you adapt, once again, to the ridiculously fast pace at which we live life here in the US. We wear ourselves out running here, running there, never slowing down until we fall into bed at night, exhausted; only to get up the next morning and do it all over again. Makes me tired just thinking about it. We don't know how to do slow and leisurely here. We need to learn. But then we are a nation of movers and shakers and we seem to pride ourselves on being that Type-A personality. There is a price to be paid for that. Moving at the speed of light doesn't allow for introspection or measured consideration. It doesn't even permit the simple act of kindness. We give up so much in our headlong rush to the finish line. We may indeed achieve much, but we sacrifice much more. Don't get me wrong. I'm not advocating that we become a nation of slackers. In actuality, we have our fair share of that. But that's another topic for another time. I just wish that we didn't feel the pervasive need to fill every moment in our quest to be the biggest, the brightest, the very best. Because to actually be those things requires the luxury of some down-time. Our brains need to have time to process all the information we are bombarding it with every moment of every day. And our bodies need time to rest and recharge. It's the way we were designed. It's not a design flaw. It is, instead, what is required for us to operate at maximum efficiency. Understand that I include myself in those who need to hear that message. I push myself far beyond the limits of what my body and brain can accomplish in a single day. And then I pile on a little more just for good measure. It's a conditioned response. Everywhere we turn, we receive subtle (and not so subtle) messages to work harder, do more, run faster. In our technologically advanced world, the messages go out hard and fast. Everyone, every cause, every gadget wants a piece of our time. And we give it, thinking we have plenty to spare, that we'll squeeze this in somehow. So we keep squeezing stuff in until we hit maximum capacity and still we push. Because we've been conditioned to feel guilty if we take a moment to catch our breath. Well, that's my sermon for the day. I must end it now because I have to work harder, do more and run faster. No time to catch my breath. Maybe tomorrow. ** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** ** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** |
| Shhhhhh! Don't spoil it. For this small moment in time, all is right with the world. O.J is going to jail - finally. Apparently the arrogant SOB was offered a plea bargain that would have given him less time than he has now been sentenced to (which, as we all know is not long enough, but at least he's finally going to serve some time) but he refused to accept the plea bargain because, according to prosecutors, he wanted "nothing short of a public apology" and prosecutors wisely refused to agree to that little stipulation. So now he will have plenty of time to sit in a jail cell and consider "If I Did It." O.J. obviously is not well acquainted with reality, but it looks like he'll be getting a close and personal look at it now. On a totally different note, but also noteworthy, it is still cold in Houston. Yes, I know cold is a relative term to us Houstonians, but I have worn a jacket and/or sweaters for two whole days now and tomorrow looks as if it will be day three. Yes, I am counting. What I'm hoping is that since we are having a dose of cold weather this early in the season, maybe that bodes well for the rest of our winter season and we'll get some even colder weather in January. January is when we typically have our 2-3 days of winter weather. In years past, we have been known to have up to TWO WHOLE WEEKS OF CONSECUTIVE COLD WEATHER. Dare I even hope for that this year? Another morsel of feel-good news--I filled up my gas-guzzling Durango the other day and forked over only two $20 bills and I got change back, to boot. It cost me $33.00 to fill up and I was on empty. Weird. At one time, I was spending $80 a pop to fill my gas tank. I tend to be an optimist, but even I would never have dared to hope that all three of the things I mentioned would happen, but the possibility of all three of them happening all at one time? Well, that's just crazy. And yet, here we are. It has to mean something. I don't know what yet, but if I figure it out, I'll let you know. |
| It appears that I am now out of practice when it comes to blogging. The whole month of November was nothing but a blur. When December 1 rolled around, I was elated. I felt as if I had been set free and could now return to "life on the outside." Let me clarify that by saying that, while I thoroughly enjoyed the experience of Nano and feel a huge sense of accomplishment in completing a novel in 30 days (even thought it was short of the 50K word mark), I could not be happier to not have to dedicate every spare moment to working on the novel. I have spent the last several days working on a website and doing some digital scrapbooking for another project that I have started. Pushing myself to participate in Nano and to see it all the way through seems to have awakened in me the urge to continue to push myself to extreme limits. I'm not sure yet if that's a good thing or a bad thing. Only time will tell, but by the time I have figured it out, I will have a working website and hopefully a budding new business. I'll keep you updated. Christmas is upon us yet again. It seems to come earlier every year. My mother always said that the older you get, the faster time goes. I used to laugh at her for saying that and would tell her in my most sarcastic, know-it-all teenage voice, "That doesn't make any sense, Mom. Time is the same no matter what age you are." I couldn't have been more wrong. She was right - time apparently puts on running shoes as we age and does sprints several times daily. And while time is sprinting past me, I stand huffing and puffing on the sidelines begging it to slow down. I am still attempting to get caught up on everyone's blog entries that I missed while I was in Nano jail in November. I feel so "out of the loop." It is winter in Houston this weekend. I think we may get lucky this year and have winter for more than one day. Winter was on Tuesday last year and I missed it, so I'm not taking any chances this year. I actually wore a sweater and a down vest when I went out earlier this evening. And my heater has kicked on numerous times tonight. I can hear you snickering out there, but trust me, when you have 11 months of summer (early, mid and hotter-than-hell summer,) it's big news when the thermometer dips into chilly territory. I'll have you to know that it is only 41 degrees right now, but according to the weather channel, it "feels like 33." I don't know about that, but I can tell you that it feels pretty durn good. I'll try to log back on here tomorrow (actually it's already tomorrow, so let's say this...) I'll try to log back on here later today and give you a weather update. I will be out of the house for a while, since I have to take advantage of winter and wear one of the sweaters I have because I love sweaters and always buy them, but never get to wear them. But I'm wearing one later today, baby! Maybe I'll even have someone take a picture to prove it. I'm off to sleep now, but first I think I'll step out on my front porch just to remind myself what the chill feels like.  |
| I was torn between two titles for this entry. The first one was - Glory Hallelujah!; the second one was - Ding Dong the Witch is Dead. Both referred to the insanity of Nano. Oh. My. God. I am deliriously happy to say that November is dead and gone and Nano is gone with it. I am sad to report that I did not reach my word goal of 50,000 words, but I am happy to report that I did reach my goal of writing a novel in 30 days. I logged 41,358 words through rain, sleet, hail, snow, a hospitalized grandbaby, and a last minute stomach virus that knocked me on my butt for a crucial 18 hours from Friday night to Sunday morning. But, I decided to go with the victory of having written a complete novel and not berate myself for not ringing the 50K bell. So - YAY! Most of all, I am happy to be back in WDC-land. Boy oh boy, have I ever missed you guys!! Congratulations to everyone who won Nano - I salute you wholeheartedly. What an awesome accomplishment! To all my friends on this site: Next year, if you hear me even thinking of doing Nano again, will someone please kick my butt all the way to Tide Country! I am going to sleep now, but first let me leave you with a little nugget of wisdom I learned this weekend. If you ever suspect that you might possibly be headed for a stomach virus, do not - I repeat, DO NOT go to a restaurant that has a Friday night special of All-You-Can-Eat Catfish. Trust me on this one. You will not be happy later on in the evening. You will be wishing that catfish and/or cornbread batter were never invented. Not to mention the addition of All-You-Can-Eat tartar sauce. Not good. Really not good. |
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| Hmmmm. I think I'll have to write itty-bitty, one or two liner blogs more often. That last one inspired more traffic than my blog has seen in a long time. I'm beginning to discover that it's a distinct possibility that I don't have my finger on the pulse of my immediate here and now as I have believed for so long. Well, hell. The way I see it, you can only keep so many balls in the air at one time. If you try to juggle too many of them, well, something is going to hit the ground. That something apparently is my blog. However, while my poor little blog is lying on the ground in a shattered heap, that is merely a temporary condition. I'm far too attached to this blog to just leave it there on the ground withering away. No, in fact I have already picked it up, patched up all the broken pieces and have hidden it away in a safe place for a short time so that it can come back stronger than ever once I can devote the proper time to it. If only there were more hours in the day - of course then I would stuff them too full as well.  |
| I was watching a news report yesteday about the California wildfires. This is what the reporter said: "I am standing here in a mobile community that caters to elderly people that caught fire yesterday." Personally, I hate when elderly people catch fire. |
| It's a little early in the day to be waxing philosophical, but I woke up with the following thoughts floating around in my brain: Why does genius so often cozy up to insanity? It's as if our brains are hard-wired with a line drawn in the sand. The closer we get to that line, the faster the neurons fire in the brain, the more brilliant our thoughts become, lucidity is at its optimum capacity. Standing toe-to-toe with that line is exhilarating, thoughts flow freely into one another, ideas take shape that previously were just pieces of a puzzle floating independently with no connectors. It's as if we have entered into an exciting new realm where THOUGHT is king. We feel alive and productive and the future is ripe with possibility. Now, if we could just be content to remain standing toe-to-toe with that line, all would be well. But, just as there is that enigmatic unrecognized force that draws us to that line to begin with, there is, as well, a more insidious force that compels us to step over that line. We're convinced that yet even more brilliance awaits us there and the lure is irresistible.Sticking a toe over the line, we are instantly convinced that we are possessed of a higher intelligence, one that doesn't answer to, nor is it constrained by, the conventions of modern thought. We feel that we have transcended the mundane, that we have risen above moral codes, conventional wisdom and any of the hundreds of puritanical restrictions placed upon us heretofore. We feel as if we're walking on a higher plain where we determine the rules (if indeed there are any rules) and are free to eschew traditionally accepted behavioral patterns. What we fail to recognize as we leap across that line in the sand and take up residence on the other side, is that our thinking has become skewed. It is not, as we passionately believe it to be, the genius we have aspired to. To the contrary, it has twisted itself into a worm of insanity that begins to work its way through the brilliance we rightly possess. Logic and reason have no place here. Flashes of brilliance still shine through from time to time, but the thread of insanity is quickly working its way through even those, distorting and deforming them. It is the classic battle between good and evil raging in the mind. I have my own ideas about why this battle exists, but that is for another blog, another time. I wrote this blog today in honor of a few brave souls in my extended family. I have watched them struggle, I have prayed and worried and denied, and I have tried to rescue them. In reality, I am helpless against this battle that rages in the minds of those I love. I wish it were not so. I wish that I could take them by the hand and lead them back to the place where their brilliance resides, the safe place where the worm of insanity can't go. But first I would have to convince them that place is enough, that they can live there happily and there is no need to wander back to that line in the sand--that edge where they seem most comfortable. I fear that I would fail in that, as I have so often failed at it before. Still, I hope. I do not admit defeat easily. My hand will always reach out to them and I will forever search for a path back for them--one they will find appealing, in the hope that someday the lure of the here and now (mundane though it may be) will be stronger than the lure of the brass ring that is always just out of reach on the other side of that line in the sand. |
| If I were never to see the letters N, A, N and O strung together as a whole again, I would be a happy woman. I feel as if I'm in prison - NANO prison. I was hoping for early release, but it looks like I will be serving my complete sentence; although I have given serious consideration to the next chapter being my final chapter, well short of the 50K word mark. In that chapter, I would have a nuclear bomb fall from the sky, Hiroshima-like, obliterating all of my carefully-crafted characters and settings. Admittedly, that might be a drastic course of action to take, but it would give me a perverse pleasure. Kind of a giant 'SHUT THE HELL UP, I'M TIRED OF LISTENING TO ALL OF YOU." if you will. Every time I open my manuscript to slog through 500 more words or so, I feel as if I've been sent to the corner as punishment. Yes, I know I'm being overly-dramatic, but it feels good, so let me have this small respite of whining and overstatement, just for the moment. Then I promise, I'll put away all my toys and trudge back to the granite quarry, heft the proverbial sledge hammer to my shoulder and start pounding away once more. I'm waiting for that fresh breeze of enthusiasm to waft over me, filling me with renewed vigor and determination. So far, no breeze. In fact, the still, dead air is beginning to stink of rotting garbage. My pointer finger tends to stray unbidden in the direction of the delete key, if I don't keep a wary eye on it; and my imagination is limping along on crutches, begging to sit down in a comfy chair. Unfortunately, that damn responsible but bratty inner child--the one who got me in this mess in the first place because she's the quintessential over-achiever--keeps cracking her bullwhip and screaming, "Onward, don't you dare stop. There'll be hell to pay if you do!" I keep trying to explain to her that it's highly likely that I'm too much of a perfectionist to do this in the required amount of time and she keeps interrupting me to say, "Don't stand her arguing with me, time's a-wasting. Get to work." That's when I completely rebel and wander off to MySpace and spend an entire evening revamping my page. So it is that my inner rebel and my uber-responsible inner child remain at war. I think I have no other choice than to rise above both of them and just finish the damn thing so I can finally get some peace. Next year, though, I'm saying Nano, NO NO. ** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** ** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** |
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