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Below is a poem that I have found in Cinn's poetry blog,
and it kind of fits perfectly to how I feel lately. I don't have a favorite poem
but if I can have one that it would be this one for most of the time. I'm really moody person
and this one would explain the most moods of all.
In a field
I am the absence
of field.
This is
always the case.
Wherever I am
I am what is missing.
When I walk
I part the air
and always
the air moves in
to fill the spaces
where my body’s been.
We all have reasons
for moving.
I move
to keep things whole.
~Mark Strand~
Here you can find entries written for
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I was reading my old blog on poetry and found Bluebird by Bukowski that you shared in your blog too. I have no idea if you will get notification for this comment but if you do I just want to tell you that I miss and love you no matter what Charlie. You were my best friend and this place doesn't make any sense without you. It feels worse than as if you're dead. I know you're here but not here for me. I wish we are persons from before, when you used to tell me nice things back as well and when I felt like I could tell you anything in this world and feel comfortable knowing you're listening and working it out with me without getting upset .
I swear I try to do things on here and at home to keep living like normal but I just can't feel happy and excited about anything. I'm getting so fucked up in my head and most of the nights I feel like I'm losing my sanity over past and everything. I was so afraid I'm losing you here too when you became too busy lately. I lost people in life all the time and can't handle losing you. I'll never have another friend in life like you, I'll never want to keep anyone in my life like I want to keep you. You're just not seasonal to me like the others were.
Cuz the more broken you were the more I wanted to hear you. Thanks for allowing me see pain in its glorious light. I thought nothing can break me after abortion, guess it can.
Charlie ~, this time I was the one that needed someone to depend on and be saved . If this is going to push you even further away, let it be as you wish. You never understood me.
I'll always love you no matter what happens with us. I don't know which one is worse: to grieve dead person or to grieve someone who is still alive. I know, the worse ever is to grieve both at the same time.
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