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 |   The catch-all for items related to and/or inspired by the music that shaped me. |
Music has played a role in nearly every situation of my life. This is where I'll be collecting items inspired by those moments- poems, lyrics, blog entries- the soundtrack of me.  I may also contribute blog-style entries here from time to time:
And this month, I've decided to take part in... ![Merit Badge in Quill Award
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Congratulations on winning the 2017 Quill Award for Best Music for [Link To Item #2072393] . *^*Delight*^* See [Link To Item #quills] for more information.](https://images.Writing.Com/imgs/writing.com/writers/badges/group-Quill_Award-1375927_6.gif)    Best Blog |
   "Day 22: Hong Kong! I don't know about you but I'm ready to do some shopping; maybe even check out a temple or two."What is up y'all? Figured I'd join you guys on Lyn's a Witchy Woman  's world tour somewhere, and today it just seems right. I have to be honest...I haven't been paying too much attention to what you guys have been up to and what sorts of trouble you're getting into...which leads me to suspect I'm the troublemaker on most of these trips (and it's been proven...ask Charlie ~  or even Kit   ). Storylines emerge, there's a night out where intoxication happens and people get a little crazy, and there were mermaids and romances and bromances and gummy bears stuck in people's hair...ahhhh, the good ol' days! Anyway, catch me up! I chose to jump in today because it fits flush with my pick for "The Soundtrack of Your Life"  , and you'll find out why in a bit. But first, I'm down to check out the Pak Tai Temple . I'm a little bit (ok, maybe a lotta bit) enthralled as to why their hours of operation are 7:26 AM - 6:57 PM. First, those are awkward numbers for times. I'm a little too OCD about things being in certain sets of round numbers, and if a place has batshit weird hours like that, I wanna know why cuz there's gotta be a reason for it. [Sidenote: This is the part where it becomes obvious I definitely did not do enough research on this place. Carry on.] Second, I am a person who searches for peace but also tends to go overboard with the disaster-causing every so often, and I get the feeling I will not be welcomed back (at best; worst case scenario is deportation) after doing whatever is right and honorable and feeling relaxed enough and at peace to basically cause some sort of embarrassing havoc. I can go from respectful and respectable to distasteful and obstinate in the blink of an eye. I'm better off being tethered to someone with one of those coiled chain/bracelet thingeys where the kid can walk but the higher power won't let 'em get too far into trouble's path. But let's get to the real reason why I'm here, shall we? Like many Americans my age at whatever time it was in the mid-late 90's, our primary introduction to Blur was the dance floor and arena banger "Song 2" ...WOO HOO!! And back in the day when I'd watch MTV2 with friends because they actually still played videos, sure, they'd show some other stuff. "Coffee And TV" is the one I seem to recall the most from my days at Briarcliff Apartments, and maybe "Parklife" (which is bundles of fun). I liked them enough based on a few of their songs that I thought "maybe it's time to get some of their music on CD". A killer idea!And don't tell me you ever actually paid for your Columbia House "12 CDs for $1" bullshit. I barely paid them, ever...and I can't be the reason they went out of business, because seriously no one paid them. People got their music and and that was that. But enough about how much of a deadbeat dick I am...Blur's greatest hits CD was one of the ones I copped, because I was caught in the middle of Napster/Kazaa going away and being sketchy, and having very little disposable income. I was starving for an injection of new music because my 600+ CDs at the time had gotten boring. (I know, it's a problem. And one that doesn't go away.) Anyway, my stepmom's family went on a once-in-a-lifetime cruise, somewhere in the mid-2000's. I remember swapping headphones with my little brother Mike and introducing him to Atmosphere, and causing all sortsa havoc one late night, running around the ship with their complementary bottle of champagne. In the daytime, however, when we weren't off sightseeing or doing onshore stuff, I was laying in the sun with a cold, overpriced beverage, and falling in love with Blur through my headphones. A band that could barely crack the US but was huuuuuuge in the UK. So much so there was an entire special edition magazine dedicated to the Oasis vs Blur controversy, when both bands released competing singles on the same day. I wonder if I still have it somewhere...it was so super British and excellently informative. The point proper is this: they went from a basic Britpop "guilty pleasure" (enough of this, Jeff  !) to a longtime love. Last year I purchased their super-nice box set (from like 2012), of all their CDs (remastered with bonus tracks) and two discs full of rarities, ollllld demos, and live stuff. It looks nice where I've stashed it in my living room, on the bottom shelf of my TV stand. But then, after a lengthy and contentious breakup and side-projects, they reconvened in, of all places, Hong Kong. They had decided to make music together again!! And in 2015, out came the album The Magic Whip . It's a glorious add-on to the Blur legacy, and one I wish I'd have been able to be a fly on the wall for. Did they visit the temples? What did they eat there? How much of a Hong Kong influence is there on the record besides the cover art? Well, I'mma tell you. Saddle up, youngins. The main point of resonance with me is the video for "Ong Ong". It basically looks like a Nintendo game from the early Super Mario Bros. era, with a fun soft-garage-rock sound (if there's such a thing). There's a, ummm, thing, trapped in a temple, and the thing-protagonist has to save her. It's very Nintendo. It's also very sweet and adorable, and the song itself is fun. Let's just enjoy it for what it is.  I've already shipped out a couple #NorbAF t-shirts...who wants one?! There's that and more goodies available in my shop . And yes, I'm self-promoting. Goods cost money, promoting costs time and money, and why the fuck not get on the DIY tip and say "Here's what I got...whaddya want?" Yeah, I feel like it gets annoying, but if you don't self-promote, who's gonna know? Can't take for granted that everyone knows, even after a bunch of texts and IG posts (speaking of Instagram, be on the lookout for a very special one very very soon!). A reminder: Barnes & Noble is now selling my book. Like, you can go there and if it's not in stock you can order it. But it's for realsies in stock in NYC! My people...the #NorbAF revolution is ON!! Ok, I'm done with you people for now. I think I gotta figure out if I'm gonna eat or just nap or struggle with that in-between stage of both. Peace, you'll know just what to do, and GOODNIGHT NOW!! "But if we stop dreaming now, lord knows we'd never clear the clouds." WE'VE GOT A FILE ON YOU!! |
  "'People stupid. The dream didn't leave, people just don't know a nightmare when they right in the middle of one.' -Marlon James. Your thoughts on this quote..."Wow Lyn's a Witchy Woman ...excellent find! Gonna hafta read up a little on this guy, fo' sho'. Anyway, hey y'all! I'm gonna start with this for the "Blogging Circle of Friends " because I'm not quite sure how I wanna get into the part for "The Soundtrack of Your Life" just yet (Spoiler Alert!! It's gonna be sad.). This is pretty deep but in a sense it's also very true. It's almost like Stockholm Syndrome in a way, if that makes sense (and in my head it does, at least). Take just about any sort of depressing situation you're in, in all phases of life. Maybe you've got a shitty job but at least it pays the bills, or you're in a lackluster relationship but hey, it's a warm body to wake up next to. Or...worst case scenario: you're livin' on the streets and can't get back on your feet (because maybe you don't want to, or just can't). It reminds me a little of one of my all-time favorite lyric quotes: "One man's ceiling is another man's floor" ...and maybe I've overthinking this now a little bit, so it's time for another paragraph, to reel myself back in. So let's assume the definition of nightmare is fluid; that it's a little different for each of us. We also have different levels of what makes us comfortable and how much comfort we feel, along with what we can tolerate. There are grey areas where we might not be comfortable with what we're tolerating but depending on the situation is will dictate the response. Now, go back to the dreams you had as a child, teenager, and young adult. What do you wanna be when you grow up? Where do you see yourself in 10 years' time? And add in all your standards, your own quirks, what you like and don't like about whatever it is you're dreaming of, and how you stack up and fit (or don't fit) in with it. Sure, for some, dreams do come true! Lucky you! And if so, you're probably not reading this anyway, so fuck you. Because for most of us, life isn't set up anymore for our dreams to become the reality we live in. Corporate America will stifle you as soon as you hit mid-management. You're not gonna be bangin' supermodels on a yacht. We have a tendency to dream big, only to settle into our realities until someone's pickin' out a pine box for us. And that's where the grey areas get murkier. Some will trudge through life happily in the reality they've accepted. And that's fine if it works for them. Others may grow bitter and cold, despondent that the life he's stuck with is the same life the other guy is enjoying. And he tries and tries and tries to make it work and find happiness in it, but there's always another setback, another bill, another promotion denied...always somethin'. And that's his life, until he retires and dies a lonely old man. His big dreams after finishing school never came close to materializing, and now he's struggling to find happiness in even the most bountiful of life's little treasures. He's living a fucking nightmare, but he's basically married to it because of the one thing it provides that keeps him goin': a paycheck. Sure, he could find a better job and eventually hit the same ceiling, but by the time he comes home he's just too aggravated and tired and that's that. Which brings me back to the point and the quote prompt. It boils down to complacency and how when shit starts to get out of hand sometimes it's easier and more convenient to figure out how to manage in "the new now" than to fix the issue/problem. We become blind to the problem for what it is, and focus on how to get around it instead of the cause of it and a proper fix. And don't bullshit me...we're all guilty of this at some point in our lives. For example: your car starts making a small but funky noise that you can't quite pinpoint its whereabouts. Sure, you could take it to a mechanic, but that costs money...so instead you turn your stereo up louder. Of course, the real nightmare is when that noise turns into a $1500 repair bill down the road, and maybe if that's as close as you can get to that car being your Dream Car, well, now all you're worrying about is how fucked you are and for how long. And in summation, people actually can become self-made nightmares. They don't know it because they refuse to acknowledge it, and as it keeps getting worse, they just keep readjusting and acclimating to their problems until the levee breaks. They max out every inch of the grey areas in the intersection of comfort and tolerance. Keep pullin' that thread, and someday you're gonna have enough to knit yourself a noose.    Man...today we lost another good one, and this one is really kinda special to me. It was reported that Peter Tork of The Monkees passed away today at age 77 from a rare form of salivary cancer. Fuckin' cancer, man. Always snuffin' out the good ones, 'cuz Big Pharm just loooooves that money associated with keepin' people alive in suffering as long as they can, rather than using science to eradicate this shit .Don't get me started on how much it pisses me off. And "Guilty Pleasures" isn't really a worthy Soundtrackers category anymore, is it? Haven't we all agreed at one time or another that we love what we love, and aren't ashamed about it? I thought we accomplished that back in the Beth days. Anyway, it's especially sad for me because The Monkees were my first concert, probably in the summer of '85 or '86. It was around that time when MTV and Nickelodeon started showing reruns from their tv show in the 60's, and because my brother and I weren't old enough yet to be trusted to be left alone during the summer, we'd go to our grandmother's house (it helped that she also had cable, which we did not have). And one week out of every summer, our aunt in Connecticut would fly us down for a week. She was awesome...a sweet condo, she'd take us to cool places and buy us stuff, and she had a waterbed! That blew our little 80's minds! It was her that took us to see The Monkees, at a little amphitheater with a rotating stage. "Weird Al" Yankovic was the opening act, and of course because I had some of his cassette tapes too as a fart joke enthusiast preteen, he put on a fun show. I had a camera and everything, but blew all my film on him. Then The Monkees came on, and they played all the hits of course (minus Mike Nesmith, which kinda sucked but whatever), and we sang along and loved every single minute of it. First concert, one of your absolute favorite bands, the cool and fun aunt... that's legit amazeballs yo. To finally see live music instead of just rockin' my mom's albums on vinyl, or catching a little tape hiss on cassette, that was the real deal. Sadly, my aunt passed in the early 90's (again, motherfuck cancer) and the band again faded into the dustbin of our adolescence. They'd occasionally creep out here and there for something, but whatevs. It wasn't until the late 90's or early 2000's when, at work one day, our supervisor came in (and I don't think he ever really cared for me). He was high-energy and herky-jerky but beloved by the old-timers in the company. Somehow we got to talking about The Monkees, and he was a huge, HUGE fan (he was easily a generation behind me, so it made sense). And in consumer electronics, our slow-dying fad at that time was the Mini-Disc. We were all required to keep an MD on us at all times to demo it (mine was a beautiful mix I recorded on the job when it was slow...it had everything: classic rock, hip hop, R&B, current alt-rock, techno...this way if I was demo-ing speakers, I could pick a song that played on the customer's taste). I had a CD/MD recording deck at home, a portable one, and an in-dash player in my car. The supervisor (known as "The Wheel", because he was always moving, always rollin') went out of his way to make me a Monkees MD...hadn't heard them in so long, and yet the songs still held up some 15 years later. "Your Auntie Grizelda" -The Monkees"Oh, no, don't look at me like Auntie Grizelda. It takes much more to be someone of your own. You've got to make it free from Auntie Grizelda, or just like her you'll have to make it alone." Kinda funny how in my head that sorta ties into the "Blogging Circle of Friends " portion of this entry...the full lyrics basically are about someone not knowing her boundaries and basically teaching the nephew to be almost like her, and the narrator is calling him out on it. Like "Bruh, you don't know it but you're living in a nightmare my man. You can't see it because you've accepted it, but we see it, and you're wack as fuck yo. If you don't cut that shit out and get right, you're gonna end up just like her." Don't wanna get too complacent with her, cuz she sounds miserable (and her fudge prolly sucks too). But what do I know? I'm just a fan, with the ability to weave prompts occasionally  .   HOLDUPWAITAMINUTE: Wasn't gonna do this part because I didn't think I'd have anything to say...but I've just been handed some BREAKING NEWS!! Apparently my book, 100, is now available in New York City at the Barnes & Noble at Union Square!! Can I get a WHAT WHAT?! from the crowd?? You dope-ass people deserve some dope-ass news, and you're hearing it here first (before it goes on Instagram, Twitter, and Facebook ). This is where it started. This is where it all began. If you're in NYC, show me some love and show you with the book!! Spread that love!!  #NorbAFOk...well, I guess dinner can wait while I share the good news...guess this wasn't a sad-ending entry after all! Let's all be joyful and take a moment to be thankful for what we have, cuz no doubt someone has it worse. No nightmares (hopefully) up in here, and up in there (wherever you are). Peace, be joyful (cuz that shit spreads), and GOODNIGHT NOW!! |
** Image ID #2146089 Unavailable **  TOTW: "A recent study showed that popular music contains angrier and sadder lyrics than ever before. The Billboard Hot 100 songs from 1951 to 2016 were measured using the following metrics: (1) Emotional Tone: anger, disgust, fear, joy, sadness; (2) Language Tone: analytical, confident, tentative; (3) Social Tone: openness, conscientiousness, extraversion, agreeableness, emotional range."Questions to think about:  Have you noticed this increase in sadness and anger in popular music? What do you think could be causing it? Do you think it’s helpful or hurtful for someone struggling with a mental health issue to listen to music that contains anger and sadness? What kind of music do you connect to with your mental health issues? Are there any songs in particular that speak to you?Hello again, kind people of the internet! It's been too long, there's too much to say now that I've been dormant here for so long, and a little bit of the itch is back...may as well scratch it. First, I feel stupid bad that this is my first entry (I think) for "Invalid Item" . I love the everlovin' fuck outta Charlie ~ for taking the time out of his busy-ass life to do this. I've been meaning to contribute since Day One here, and have yet to besides a few comments here and there. And this does not mean I'll continue after today; I'm just in the right mood/headspace. You'll have that. Second (and now finally to address the prompt), Motherfuck the Billboard Hot 100 with a rolled-up copy of that magazine that's been laying on the back of your toilet for 23 years. They don't dictate what I listen to, and if that's your guide, yo, shed your sheepskin. You're being fed! You're a sucka to the radio! The "Top 40" yang is what you listen to when you're a kid trying to fit in with the girly-girls...and that's how you get your heart broken, with nothing solvent to see you past that. You end up bitter and lonely, secluded in your room, writing bad teenage poetry. How do I know? Oh, I know. And I'm done with "first, second, third, etc..." cuz that's just like Casey Kasem in reverse. RIP to the classiest radio countdown DJ ever. So yeah, I don't play by those rules, and that's fine because that's what works for me. There is no hiding from the internet and viral hits, but you can limit your exposure. Therefore, I'm unqualified to say whether or not pop music has more anger or sadness. IDGAF if Ariana Grande is calling out exes (though Pete Davidson is pretty much a baller on SNL's Weekend Update , especially when referring to his own mental health struggles). Taylor Swift can live her life and attract all the high-profile dudes she wants, then dump them and write songs about them 16-year-olds will use as their mantras until they hit college, and again, IDGAF. "Popular" doesn't work for everyone. Now, I can't speak for everyone and will only speak for myself...but when I'm in one of those moods where I'm angry and depressed and don't have any reason why, I prefer to listen to heavier music. I'm a Hip Hop kid at heart, but if I'm out and about with my iPod, I'm gonna throw on Helmet, or older Thursday, or Deftones...something that gets loud without trying too hard. "Opposite Action"- something I learned taking DBT Classes. Wait...maybe I'm mixing shit up. Whatever. Flow into it, and let your mind focus on that instead of why (or why not) you're so the way you are in the moment. Kicking your own ass into being "in the moment" is hard, but so fucking worth it. Especially when you feel like you're your own worst enemy. Luckily, music saves...with the caveat that we let it. I have specifically claimed one song for my own as far as my mental health is concerned, and I've written about it way too many times to do it again. It's "Smart Went Crazy" by Atmosphere (you can find it in the previous entry), and it really connects me to the first time I was a committed inpatient because of suicidal ideations. That entire album was my jam for weeks on end...and then I lost my mind. The "smart" kid in the family. The "go-getter". "Fun guy". The forgotten one, because he was "so busy" working his ass off and coming home, decompressing with excessive booze, writing until his hands were shaking, and going to bed only to wake up and do it all over again (in an environment that became toxic the more and more he went there, to the point of becoming sick to his stomach upon entering the parking lot). The soundtrack to my second inpatient, where I drove about 70MPH to a hospital about 95 miles away (while blowing well above the legal limit for survival, let alone driving) with a fantastic program in one way and a terrible one in every other way (being allowed to stay up and watch Monday Night Football where your favorite team loses in a last-minute bit of fuckery isn't great). Yeah, that was my jam...and you can posit "jam" any particular way or wording you like, because it really was every which way it could go for me. Because I'm basically a hermit these days (save for the times I really need to go somewhere), I just go with what I'm in the mood for. I'll waste an entire trip walking somewhere because the shuffle gods are not on my side. I've also stopped trying to associate music to people and/or events. No one likes a song ruined because their ex liked it. No one wants the little indie band they love tainted by something their stupid, malfunctioning brain did. I had an fairly decent polo shirt that somehow accompanied me to not one, but two trips to the Behavioral Health Unit. And in a time when I had a small fraction of my clothes returned to me by the ex, I had to let go of that shirt. I couldn't wear it anymore. Too many bullshit memories about how broken the healthcare system is. I'm glad I've relaxed a bit and calmed down mentally since the last time I had to experience the depths of the medical system in 2012. And with that came other challenges, of which are neither here nor there. You want music, and that I will give to you. What once used to be a "guilty pleasure" to me (because my immediate friends were like "IDGAF, let's ball") and one friend was totally down when my sis and I rolled up to play some basketball, is A Tribe Called Quest. I don't really have "guilty pleasures" anymore...I'm old enough to like what I like and not be ashamed about it. I've got shit in my iTunes library just because my mom likes it, and some of it's grown on me. Not gonna lie though...that 160GB iPod is getting maxed, and some of her faves have been whittled away. I digress. Currently I'm reading Hanif Abdurraqib's Go Ahead In The Rain: Notes To A Tribe Called Quest . I pre-ordered it, partly cuz it was ATCQ, and partly cuz Abdurraqib's previous book (They Can't Kill Us Until They Kill Us ) is fucking amazing. If you love music, and even if you hate pop music, or hate classic rock, it don't matter. There's something in it for you. Wow, I'm digressing again, but you get that when you read my blog entries from front to back (you won't ).Anyway, I'm gonna roll with an undercover favorite that was totally one of mine but not on the radar of the people I rolled with. A Tribe Called Quest, "Electric Relaxation" "A gritty little something on the New York street. This is how I represent over this here beat."  Hey yo...in case you missed it, here's my Hawk & Young interview. Don't do dope and don't be a dope and I'm not a dope but I did a dope interview. About my book. Which you should buy if you already haven't. And yo...free signed and shipped books and merch up fer grabs! Get up and get down with...
 I really really wanted to jump in on the "30-Day Blogging Challenge ON HIATUS" adventures led by Lyn's a Witchy Woman , especially in the New Zealand area where we could hang with Elle - on hiatus  , but it wasn't in my cards on those days. There's still time for it to be in your cards though, if you're into cards of whatever kinds of cards those are.Alright, me people to the left, right, and center...I'm done here and I'm gonna grill some cheese (between bread...I'm not a savage) and nosh on that while it's embedded in a little bit of soup (it's shorts weather for me, but there's still snow on the ground, so fuck it...comfort food and let's go!!). Peace, my mind was in a frenzy, and GOODNIGHT NOW!! |
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Still remember your address on Penora.
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But, with extreme shit hitting me I bury under ground and neither internet nor real life can find me then.
