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by Tyove
Rated: E · In & Out · Emotional · #2094933
It took a lot of time, a lot of thought and a lot of lonely but I did it.
I always assume I am at fault first. They know me so little that they don't see that I have been through all the emotions and dealt with all of the feelings that were unsettled due to their lack of communication. As I pondered the past 11 years and all of the most recent events I found peace in it all. I can't change them. I can't make them be better people. People who tell the truth, love unconditionally and give just as much as they take.

It is clear that they are upset that I called everyone out on their behaviors. They did not own anything they did, even the things they admitted to they retracted later. It is very unsettling that a parent can dislike their child so much. I knew I should of just sucked it up and moved on, but I could not let go of the anger handling it that way. It was my error in judgment to think that everyone was capable of adult conversations with honesty.

I am no longer looking to just let go of the anger, I have worked through all of that. I have seen where I failed, where I could of done better and even what I did completely wrong. As an adult I am accountable of all of my actions. I cannot change the things that happened, but I can certainly learn from them. I will never allow another to fill my head with so much negative that I can't imagine a positive. I will not look back on these years as a loss any longer. I see it now as many valuable life lessons. I am grateful to see clearly and even more grateful to no longer feel imprisoned by others. I am responsible for my life, no one else. I choose to love. I choose to be loved. I choose to share love. I choose to be happy. I choose me.

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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/handler/item_id/2094933-I-Choose-Me