I had started working at PolyBurger about a month before. It was a fast food place that specialised in two- or three-layer burgers, and it was a pretty okay place to work. I got there and changed into my light blue PolyBurger shirt and cap, and was about to go into the front and start my shift when I heard someone shout "Conrad!"
It was the manager, Kenny, a guy in his thirties with a bulging belly and round, friendly face. "Could you come into the office for a moment? We have to talk about something." I followed him in, wondering what it could be about, and noticed as he closed the door and waddled round to the other side of the desk that my co-worker Amber was in there too. I sat down on the plastic chair next to her and smiled hello. She was a really beautiful girl, slim but with big breasts and long red hair that was currently tied up under her cap, but she didn't say much to anyone else at work. I knew her in my year at school and she seemed kind of aloof.
"Okay. Well, what I have to say to you two is a little delicate. See, I'm concerned that the two of you don't quite... fit in here at PolyBurger."
"Why not?" I blurted. I'd always got on well with customers and everyone else!
"Well, to tell you the truth, the company has a sort of image it likes to maintain, and I worry that you two don't quite match up. We had a mystery shopper in here last week and the two of you were working, and what they reported to head office was that you didn't have the PolyBurger look." He saw our blank faces, and sighed.
"PolyBurger exists for people who enjoy their food. We don't have any pretensions to be a healthy place to eat, we serve big portions and our customers tend to be big people. How do you think it makes them feel to have their triple-burger with extra cheese cubes served to them by a guy who's as skinny as a rake or a girl who looks like she's just walked out of a fashion magazine?"
"What are you getting at?" Amber asked, frowning.
"Here's what I'm prepared to do," said Kenny. "I'm going to offer you unlimited free food from PolyBurger over the next two months, and give you a chance to tip the scales in your favour. Otherwise... I'm sorry, but I may have to let you go."
"But –" I began, but Kenny cut me off.
"Look, we go through this every once in a while, it's pretty standard. I don't see what the problem is! I'm offering you unlimited free food from one of the best burger chains in the country. If either of you is some sort of health nut, I think they're hiring at Victor's Nuts and Seeds, I can give you a good reference. But you're both fine employees, I'd hate to see you go."
I exchanged glances with Amber. Her face was impossible to read.
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