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 Review #4026763 |
 |  | Never Tell a Lie  [E] Sometimes the truth hurts.  |
| (4.5)  Greetings!The following are only my personal opinions. Ultimately, you and only you can decide what works best for your item. I was attracted to the title because I like to read children stories with a moral and the title seemed to deliver a very general moral too. I liked the plot of the story and how you wrote it in present tense. There are not a lot of stories that are written in present tense and reading a story in a different tense was kind of amusing. I liked how you developed the story in the beginning and the dragged the reader in your story, making a lot of suspense and the conclusion was humorous!  Jimmy is a class A troublemaker! A simple lesson but children take it so differently! That is exactly what makes them innocent and cute! I laughed throughout the poem! Jimmy sold all mummy's secrets to the teacher! Having trouble with children is a common thing for mothers but I don't get to read many items similar to this and this was a perfect example of it and I quite enjoyed it! I had a single suggestion for your story  >>I glance over my shoulder at my son’s usually overly happy kindergarten teacher. Using two adverbs simultaneously isn't the best example. The sentence seems quite awkward. You may want to reword it. On behalf of "a very Wodehouse challenge" .  Thank you for allowing me to read and review your story. Write On! Take care and Have a great day! ** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **  My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
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