Hello S Ferguson~ Prepping for Prep ,

I just read your [item type] "Invalid Item" , which I found when I hit random review.

Disclaimer: Please remember that the following suggestions are based off of my own opinion and personal interpretation of your work. Feel free to take and/or toss out any of my suggestions.



A sexy story on relieving the immediate needs of a fed up girlfriend serving both herself and revenge at the same time.



I was hooked from the beginning. I wanted to know what she was going to do about being so upset about Chris standing her up for such and important discussion.





The alley was the main scene and it was not described. THere could've been some more sensory details about the alley to complete the physical description, but it didn't ruin the story for me.



April, the wounded girlfriend and Sam, the soon to be ex-boyfriends best friend, both have individual personalities and feel like real people. Well done with the characterization in this short story.



There is a definite beginning , middle and end.

THere is no real conflict other than a conflict of emotion, though there is a challenge presented and resolved and that made the story plot propel forward.





The dialogue was unique per character, speech tags not over used, and it felt realistic to the situation at hand.



The climax of the story is at the very end with her simply walking away, and I thought that was a great ending considering her situation and attitude. It fit her well.



The ending is my favorite.




None




Nicely done, the sex wasn't over done for a short story, nice balance. Thanks for sharing your work!

I enjoyed reading your work and hope my review was helpful and encouraging!

A Review from "Simply Positive Review Forum " !
** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **