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Review #4132087
Viewing a review of:
10 Days of Spring Fantasy Contest Book  [E]
A prompt contest
by Nixie
         Review for entry/chapter: "The Romance Cake ~ Day 4" 
Review by ~ Aqua ~
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Access:  Public | Hide Review (?)
A "Game of Thrones"  *Sun* Martell *Sun* Review


A "SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP"  review!

This was a very humorous and an interesting read! So far of all the items I have read over the weekend, this one is my favourite! The idea of capturing the journey of marriage of fifty-years in a cake is a wonderful idea that seemed impossible but you creatively put it in your story that is imaginable and very much possible! How old is Madeline? That was the only question in my mind *Bigsmile*

I loved how you made Trent see through Madeline's eyes, everything she made. You present why each feature of the cake is a romance cake by exploring how their parent's spent their lives together, from the time they met to their marriage, to honeymoon to afterwards. The line that really clicked me was when Trent said that it was a romance in a cake, beautiful! Loved it!

The flow of your story was good, there was no interruption, amazing vocabulary and beginning, captured the attention of the reader right then! Apart from the whole idea, my favourite lines were when Trent says that spring magic is typical female fantasizing and when he says he doesn't want to deal with Miss Armageddon, amazing! *Laugh*

I just had one suggestion for your story.

==>one of your spurious remarks. I'
one of your spurious remarks. I - "

Does the I written at the end of the sentence show being interrupted? If this is the case, it would be better to perhaps add a - or dots to show incomplete dialogue.


THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR SHARING YOUR WORK!
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