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Review #4133365
Viewing a review of:
 The Storyteller  [E]
A story i wrote in 5 minutes about a creative boy who couldn't control his talking.
by Ben M
Review of The Storyteller  
Review by abbyer
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Access:  Public | Hide Review (?)



*BalloonR* Welcome to WDC from "Newbie Welcome Wagon" ! *BalloonR*




Hello, Ben.
This is a review for "The storyteller".


*Dropb* If you really wrote it in only five minutes, it is a brilliant job. I would guess it would take more time than this to come up with these sentences to describe what you did (unless you had it already planned out in your mind.)


*Dropg* I found your description exceptional. I would never think of describing talking like drinking soda. I liked very much the way you laid it out, words like bubbles is so accurate, actually, especially for someone who talks too much. As I was reading it, I could actually picture the drink and the bubbles inside the mouth. I could "see" him shaking the can and how the words would explode. Beautiful description, I loved it. What I also liked was the secret thoughts the boy had. It is truly a gift, the storytelling, we all can see it through the eyes of our children who stay mesmerized every time they hear a story, whether it is great or not, because it feeds their (and our) imagination.


*Dropy* While the first paragraph is written on a serious note and gives us a great description (or introduction), it was the first line of the second paragraph that came out of nowhere and made me laugh out loud. The last sentences justify the comedy genre, and the comments inside brackets made me think of a boy in junior high. Funny and cute at the same time.


Thanks for sharing. Keep writing.
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