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Review #4213387
Viewing a review of:
 It's November  [E]
A poem about the feeling of November
by Nbnelson2
Review of It's November  
Review by ~Minja~
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Access:  Public | Hide Review (?)
Hi Nbnelson2

*BalloonR* Welcome to WDC from "Newbie Welcome Wagon" ! *BalloonR*


It's been a pleasure to review your "It's November"  on behalf of the Simply Positive Group. Please be reminded that my review is based on one person's opinion and you have all rights to choose if you like it or not..

*Starb* Overall impression?

This sounds so melancholic to me and I especially love the imagery in the first stanza. My favorite season was always autumn and you pictured perfect image of it there. Though I don't know what kind of appointments are you talking about here but it gave the essence and importance to November. There are a lot of different images within this piece: rustling leaves, gentle swaying movements, the pages of my calendar have turned, the sun has moved, and all of them together merge into just one; autumn.

What I found distracting is repetition of word 'somehow' at the beginning of second and third stanza. I think that you could easily go without 'somehow' in either of them. I also noticed in third stanza where you wrote:

*Flagp* Somehow the months have passed.
The pages of my calendar have turned.
The sun has moved
To a different part of the sky
And it's November.

There's some punctuation issues here. I think it would read better if you wrote:

*Flagp* Somehow the months have passed,
the pages of my calendar have turned,
and the sun has moved
to a different part of the sky;
it's November.

This is how I would write this stanza but it doesn't mean you should change your writing according to my suggestion of course. I'd be glad if you at least consider it. Thank you for sharing your lovely writing here with us and I hope you enjoy in your stay here. All smiles..*Smile*.

~Minja~
Founder of "WdC Kind Hearts" 
Resident host at "Once Upon a Jane Austen Activity" 
*Pencil* Be courageous and try to write in a way that scares you a little *Pencil*
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*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
   *CheckG* You last responded to this review 04/24/2016 @ 5:45pm EDT
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