Hi Moarzjasac ,

A "Game of Thrones"  House Martell Review!

First impression:

Your poem nicely reflects the honesty and wonder of children, before they grow up.

General impressions:

Your poem has a smooth flow to it. I like the consonance in your poem created by the letter s and the s-sounds throughout your poem.

You capture the innocence of children nicely in your poem, this is especially seen in the third stanza. I love the visuals of the bubbles in sunlight and the rings of colour.

Your narrator yearns to see the world as he once did, through the eyes of a child. When we grow up we take on a whole load of baggage, we pick up prejudices and preconceptions, and we lose that ability we once had to make friends at the drop of a hat.

Favourite quotes:


These lines are filled with consonance, and that creates a nice harmony when reading. The lines also epitomise your narrator's hopes and dreams.

Thank you for sharing your work with us! Write On!


Lord Andy~Sunspear of Martell




My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .