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Review #4261029
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"SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP

Hello there, Dalimer Corwyn
Welcome to WDC! *Type*
This is a Simply Positive Review!


*Boat* You've visited my portfolio recently, so I decided to pop into your port and find an item to review. I am happy I did so because I really enjoyed this story. The title caught my attention so this curious reader decided to take a look.


*Lightning2* I just loved this story on so many levels.


The building of the scenes and introducing the character:


*Check*On a school bus, heading back home after school.

*CheckO* Mysterious box on the youth's lap, described

*CheckY* Passing-by rows of houses, wondering what kind of lives do people living in those brick houses, have. How different from his?

*BoxCheckR* These things all added to the imagery for the reader and made her feel like she was right there on the bus. You make the reader care for your character.

*Paperdoll* I felt for the teen being on the bus for an hour and a half to get to and from school. That's a tough bit of traveling for a youth.

*Binoculars* I can see this is for a contest as the prompt words were in bold print. However, other than being bold, the words did not distract from the story. You fit them into it quite smoothly.

*TrophyG* The ending was really special. A mother understands that handmade gift is from the heart, no matter how imperfect it may have come out, it is the best gift to her.


Good job! *Vine2*

Until next time--write on!

Regards,
WebWitch *Witch*








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