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 Review #4504444 |
 | The Delusions of Maurice Abercrombie  [13+] He murders people for no reason, but nobody in town seems to care until it's too late.  |
| (4.0)  Welcome to WDC from "Newbie Welcome Wagon" ! Greetings, Olivier Peer! For your first piece on here, this is pretty dark. But since I love horror and everything dark, I didn't think it was too bad. The idea of Abercrombie taking out his anger on strangers isn't so far-fetched, especially if he was feeling like he was being singled out for being different. And if he were to truly believe that he was 'f****d in the head, then he really has lost it or he's been teased to that point. Sorry. I'm no psychiatrist, but I'm trying to get a grip on this dude's mental status. Some of the images you used as he got rid of the girl's body were quite vivid, but for a piece like this I don't think you should hold you punches. It is what it is, so to speak... One question/niggle: 'all that was left was her bones, which he broke apart with his bones' (Just how does that work? Or is that a typo?)) Otherwise, good job. Kee ponw ritin gon, Olivier, and welcome to WdC! If you like to write, then you're going to love it here! PS-You might want to get your bioblock (biography) set up so we can know a little something about you (hobbies, favorite books/authors, location, etc.), but that's up to you, of course. PSS-And since you’re new here, perhaps you’d like to check out "Noticing Newbies" and introduce yourself to the rest of the community if you haven’t already.
PSSS-If you want more exposure for your items you can put them on the Please Review Page under Community on the left hand side.
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