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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/my_feedback/action/view/id/4509285
Review #4509285
Viewing a review of:
Day to Day happenings in my life  [13+]
The simplicity of my day to day.
by Sumojo
Review by Emily
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Access:  Public | Hide Review (?)
Hi Sumojo ! Hannah ♫♥♫ gifted you the blog review she won from the "Blog-On Bonanza Raffle. I apologize it has taken me this long to complete the review - life and such has been hectic! Anyway, I hope you are having a good day! Let's get into the review ...

*StarB* Starting at the top with the cute cover image of a puppy - is that your Weimaraner? What a lovely welcoming face to bring folks into your blog. I also think your blog title and brief description are well-suited to your style of writing. Nothing is overly formal here, which I appreciate. It makes the reader feel welcome and not intimidated to see what you have to say. And just a quick note about the E rating: I believe you should increase this rating to ASR or 13+ simply because you speak about topics in your blog entries that may not be appropriate for every audience. Even without explicit wording, you talk about your daughter leaving rehab and getting wasted, for example, which is not E rated.

*StarG* I am curious about why you chose the genre "Activity" though? Usually WDC items listed as Activities are things that other members can participate in. Perhaps another genre would make more sense such as "Personal," "Experience," or "Opinion?" I do like your choice to list "Arts" and "Community" as genres though. Blogging is an art and builds a community! *ThumbsUpL* *Bigsmile*

*StarB* Moving down the page to the item body before the entries begin: I like your statement here. Again, it is welcoming the reader into your life. It is matter-of-fact with no strings attached. A suggestion I have would be to add a tiny bit more flair perhaps with a picture or emoticons? Click the dropnote below for a simple suggestion. *Smile*

Emily's Opinion on Blog Item Body

*StarG* Now we get into the actual entries! *Surfing* Right off the bat, I appreciate how honest you are. You let your emotions show, which comes across clearly through your writing. You have good days and bad days and share each one in your blog. This is a great quality for a blogger to have because you are relateable to your reader. People will see their struggles mirrored in what you write, which makes them feel connected to you and more likely to come back and follow your life's story in your blog thus building support for you and all that you are dealing with. From reading what I could of your blog, I can see how much you are going through. I'm sorry you're dealing with breast cancer and I'm really hopeful the post-surgery results will be positive. I know you're also dealing with your daughter's troubles. This is especially hard, but I'm glad you have support from your husband (your Piglet, perhaps?). Your most recent entry from October 12th was lovely. I remember reading Winnie the Pooh as a child, and Piglet's understanding in your entry brought back so many memories - everyone needs a Piglet. *Pig*

*StarB* When I'm judging for the "30-Day Blogging Challenge ON HIATUS, there are really only a few aspects of someone's blog I judge on. Those are: 1. How engaging/entertaining/original the entry is, 2. If I feel the author's emotion in the entry, 3. If the entry is personal to the blogger, 4. If the grammar is appropriate, and 5. If the style and presentation of the entry is easy to read. In your entries, I can say right away that you'd easily have high marks for #1 (Originality), #2 (Emotional), and #3 (Personal). #4 is grammar, which is a little silly to judge. Of course, blogs are not meant to be formal writing, so your grammar does not have to be flawless, but it should at least be readable. Your writing is perfectly fine from that standard too, so I won't harp on it. *Smile*

*StarG* When judging blogs for their style and presentation, I look at several factors mainly relating to how the entry "looks." Is it broken into paragraphs? Is the font appropriate? Is the text size appropriate? Would the entry benefit from changes in text style such as bold or italics or color? Of course, all of this is subjective, so you're welcome to take what you like from my suggestions and throw out the rest.

*StarB* In my opinion, I would increase the standard font size of your entries to 3.5 rather than 3. This is because the rest of the site is size 3 font, so your words are less likely to stand out. Second, I would ensure my paragraphs are separated by a blank line so they don't appear to run together. Third, if you are writing to a prompt, I would write the prompt in the entry and give it a different color or put it in bold so it is separate from the rest of the entry. Writing the prompt in the entry would also help readers to your blog understand what you are writing about if they didn't click on your entry from the group who gave the prompt in the first place. For example, your entries on August 26th are from the "Invalid Item, but I don't know what the prompt is, so it is difficult to follow along.

*StarG* Thank you so much for letting me snoop through your blog today! Again, I apologize for taking almost 2 weeks to make time to do this. I hope my suggestions are useful! Please let me know if I can expand on anything or explain myself better. Have a great rest of your day!

-Emily


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