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Review #4510649
Viewing a review of:
 Sleepless Nights.  [13+]
When a man forgets himself in a desperate search for sleep, what will he do?
by JM
Review of Sleepless Nights.  
Review by Angus
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
Access:  Public | Hide Review (?)
*BalloonR* Welcome to WDC from "Newbie Welcome Wagon! *BalloonR*

Konnichiwa, JM.
For as short as this is, it's not bad. I like the concept, but I think you could have gone into a little more background or history about why you weren't sleeping. You say it because it was because she poisoning you with her medicine, but was that what was keeping you awake? Also, why was she trying to kill you?
Or were you just paranoid out of your mind from terminal insomnia? Hey, it could happen! *Bigsmile*
I know I asked too many questions, this was a short shorty, and I probably read too much into this, so I don't expect you to answer this. But I just wanted to suggest some things if you ever decide to expand on it (it has potential!) or when you write something else a little longer.
A couple of niggles:
'infront' is two words
'I started to have issue(s) sleeping'
Kee ponw ritin gon, JM! Once again, welcome to WdC, and have a ghoulish great Halloween! *Ghost*


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Angus Hand

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