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Review #4744916
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Bobby-Q  [E]
A tourist needs directions. Writer's Cramp Entry. 25 lines
by IE
Review of Bobby-Q  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Access:  Public | Hide Review (?)
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GROUP
The Iron Bank of Braavos  (13+)
For G.o.T. Activity
#1994693 by Gaby ~ Keeper Of The Realm
"Game of Thrones Hello fellow writer! My Name is Sandra. I am one of the sly foxes.
title: Bobby-Q
First Impression: I laughed at the title, Bobby-Q. I anticipated this would be a story of a child describing a barbecue. Whoa, you have almost transcribed a whole other language here. This is fun to read out loud, but, of course, I could not replicate the necessary Southern accent. I do ask myself if people really do speak in this manner. Thanks for the clarification re 'onct.' I never expected to see or read that word with a pronounced, emphatic letter 't' attached to it. Yes, I will admit to hearing 'y'all spoken in movies.
What needs your attention: Although you are writing with/in a dialect, I do not see any glaring errors , or need for editing. Wait a minute. Perhaps the speaker would not enunciate the letter 'd' at the end of 'told'. Might he say, "tol'?"
What I liked best: I sense an exuberance, a joy in these words. The speaker possesses a great deal of vitality, a joie de vivre. He/she exudes enthusiasm. It is funny, but we hear 'bobby-q'. We also still comprehend what the speaker is sharing. I can appreciate this would all be rattled off quickly. It is an art form to slur all those words together. The speaker also clearly has fun with him or herself. I know what a "knee slapper" is. "Yer nose'll lead t'way." What a delightful yet insightful direction. I cannot argue with "I might could hep wit' dat." Colloquialism lends an enchantment to speech and you have captured it in this piece.
Overall Impression: You have positively convinced me I need to travel wherever there is and sample me some delicious Bobby-Q ribs. Thank you for allowing me to read your work. It has been a pleasure. What does the fox say??? Listen carefully.
(1850 characters) DISCLAIMER: The views and opinions in this review are mainly the things discovered by the reader and therefore, do not reflect necessarily to the group, activity and/or event being affiliated herein. This is only the opinion and suggestions of the reviewer and it is still up to the author of this piece to consider this review as a corrective action or otherwise.
   *CheckG* You responded to this review 04/14/2024 @ 3:52pm EDT
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