This week: The Unexpected Calamities Edited by: fyn  
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He who knows no hardships will know no hardihood. He who faces no calamity will need no courage. Mysterious though it is, the characteristics in human nature which we love best grow in a soil with a strong mixture of troubles. ~~Harry Emerson Fosdick
Times of great calamity and confusion have been productive for the greatest minds. The purest ore is produced from the hottest furnace. The brightest thunder-bolt is elicited from the darkest storm. ~~Charles Caleb Colton
You have a strange relationship with calamity when you're a writer: you write about it; as an artist, you objectify and fetishize it. You render life into material, and that's a creepy thing to do. Tony Kushner
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Perhaps, using the word 'calamity' is an exaggeration. Unexpected occurrences. Unplanned delays. Sheer craziness leading to exhaustion. Those might be better. Regardless, two extra unplanned-for days of my delightfully energetic great-grandson and writing do not mix well with writing. Anything! I don't think I could have written a coherent grocery list!
I need to learn how to lock my phone so I can put it down. Didn't dare as his mother lets him play with hers. Why he doesn't dial the ends of the earth on her phone is beyond me. IDEA: If your child must have an electronic device to play with - get him his/her own. (What a concept!)
Parenting now is So very different from when my kids were little. By three years old, my three kids understood that please and thank you could get them almost anything. It is scary that he has, "I'm sorry." down pat.
We have a lot of 'stuff' here. Our house is not child-proof. Heck, it is barely people-proof! Much of it is absolutely fascinating to a three-year-old. Unfortunately, much of it is fragile, glass, mouth-sized, or has many pieces. It is also, probably on a glass table or carefully balanced on its stand. We locked sliding glass doors, used whatever we could to block off doorways. He is an obstacle course genius. Barely slowed him down enough to let me get to him before anything happened, was broken or toppled. It has been an exercise in frustration, lack of sleep, regrowing the eyes in the back of my head that retired two generations ago, and trying to outwit, outplay and, out-maneuver the delightfully cute and deviously clever JK.
The planned couple of days was fine, the extension was daunting! There is a reason that typical parents are not pushing seventy!
That being said, I am now already planning on using the 'great and glorious bubble storm' in something. Possibly the results of the "I do it!" insistence of his dressing himself. Glad we had nowhere to go as he was so very proud of his 'getting dressed.' Of course, he had his little legs through the short sleeves of his t-shirt and his head through one leg of his shorts and his arms in the waist part and a leg opening. I really should have gotten a picture of him, but I doubt I will ever forget it.
QUESTION: anyone know how to get ink out of a couch? An artfully placed blanket will probably be my solution. Even the currently-running Amazon Prime Days don't offer an affordable couch! LOL.
That old thing about the banana peel? Forget the peel. A piece of banana on the kitchen floor is way, way, way, WAY more disastrous. (We have a one-butt kitchen with all sides squared around about a four-square-foot opening in the middle.) I think I connected with every available surface on the way to slamming my knee on the floor (on top of one of his little cars, of course) and cracking my head on the corner of the stove. A fly on the wall would have found my contortions hilarious, I am sure. In retrospect, it was sort-of funny. The headache went away and I'll be limping for a while, but again, fodder for something in a short story one of these days. One has to laugh it off or (at the very least) console myself with the idea that it may all prove useful.
So this newsletter is a bit shorter than normal, but I really need to get my knee unbent and up as it is currently roughly the size of a soccer ball.
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Elle - on hiatus  enthouses: Ooh, I got 20 out of 30 right. I'm feeling pretty happy about that!  Definitely some new words here for me to learn though. Thanks!
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For Authors: June 23, 2021 Issue [#10844]
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