Lonely Killer

(Open at a relatively small two room apartment at around nine in the morning. There is the living room where Jack and Ken are sitting at a round table set for three, a door leading into another room which leads to the outside. Jack is sitting down nervously as if in a deep thought. Ken is walking around anxiously and can barely contain his excitement. Both men are dressed fairly casually and are wearing fake mustaches.)
KEN:
Don’t you just love killing people?
JACK:
Meh…
KEN:
I mean it’s just great right? How many people can say they kill for a living?
JACK:
Well we really can’t, we’re actually not supposed to say anything that why we have these disc…
KEN:
I was working a damn desk job before this. A desk job for chrissake! Now look at me,(grabs jacks face) Look at me!
JACK:
(aggressively moves his hands away from his face)
KEN:
Look at me! I got no boss I got to kill my boss!
JACK:
We still have a boss, we just don’t never see him…
KEN:
(sits down, sighs, and takes a drink) Yep this is the life…
JACK:
Ken?
KEN:
Jack?...
JACK:
You never doubt this job do you?
KEN:
Just like I never doubt the sun rising
JACK:
It’s just that…I’m not sure if I want to do this anymore
KEN:
(Slams head down in aggravation) Oh god here comes the sob story (takes another drink)
JACK:
I just don’t like killing people, I mean sure it has its fun (chuckles), Like last week that woman called a hit on her husband.
KEN:
HA! And we open the door and we see a colossal piece of crap sitting there on the couch watching sports of all thing. (Begins laughing hysterically) How is it that you’re so fat 50 shots and a couple stabs just don’t bring you down?
JACK:
(Begins laughing along)
KEN:
I mean really we were shooting and stabbing for like fifteen minutes before he even fell down!( both men continue laughing for a while and then they calm down)…that was my diner for the week
JACK:
Yea…that was pretty fun. (Grin fades) But the only reason I kill is to keep food on the table, when I lost my job I couldn’t tell that to May…sometimes I think that there’s a better way ya know?
KEN:
You’re  getting real weak on me, at least hear there ain’t no rules, (Points outside)out there, there are rules and limits, we don’t have to limit ourselves, here we set the boundaries.
JACK:
But everything has boundaries right?
KEN:
(Stands up and begins walking around)The world out there is full of liars and phonies. Everybody wants somebody dead, and that’s where we come in. We do what everybody wishes they could do. We are superior
JACK:
sigh…
KEN:
take this job and embrace it! You’re not some digit anymore! Hear you get to be different, let out your inner animal that people are afraid to let loose. Let it take you
JACK:
Are you sure there’s no other way?
KEN:
I wouldn’t lie to you, that’s what the people on the outside do (Pause). Look at it this way, what we do is no more legal than the drug business or prostitution or the black market. There is a worldwide need for people to be killed and we’re the ones to kill’em, supply & demand. We’re just eating our peace of the American pie.
JACK:
(Nod with approval) Yea you’re right
KEN:
Damn right I’m right! Now let kill the next son of a gun who walks through that door! You poisoned his drink right?
JACK:
(holds up drink) with extra arsenic
KEN:
Now that’s what I’m talkin about you see? Killin ain’t so bad…(sits back down) So now we play the game of waiting
         (Long silence)
JACK:
Sooo… who the sorry S.O.B anyways?
KEN:
I dunno, Boss man calls me two this morning and says to get you and head to this address and wait here for the next job.
JACK:
But who’s that?
KEN:
I told you I don’t know, whoever walks through the door
JACK:
Weird, he usually tells us…who do you think it is?
KEN:
I dunno, probably another fat guy
         (Doorbell rings)
I’ll get it! (goes out of living room into other room to open the door)
MAY:
Hi, I’m here for the meeting
         (Ken looks up and down at her almost sexually, May clearly feels uncomfortable) 
KEN:
Wait here (Goes back to Jack) it’s a fat guy (Goes back to open door) Come on in
         (May and Ken walk through the door as he holds the door open for her, as she walks through the door Jacks eyes light up in disbelief and he stares at her the whole time as Ken and May take their respective seats.)
So how’s about you start us off eh?
MAY:
Sure (shuffles through papers) well I was reviewing the uh… (Notices Jacks scare) Can I help you?
KEN:
Yes he’s just uhm, give us a minute (Jack pulls ken in to the next room) What the hell are you doing?
JACK:
Ken…
KEN:
What
JACK:
That’s my wife
KEN:
What?
JACK:
That’s May that’s my wife!
KEN:
Ohhh! (Pauses) So?
JACK:
We can’t kill her she’s my wife!
KEN:
So what man she’s just your wife (walks to the door) She gonna die anyways so why not…
JACK:
(Stops him) We are not killing my wife
KEN:
(Pushes him off) Why are you being such a girl about it!? Isn’t your wife the reason you’re so uptight? The reason you don’t sleep at night? (Pause) Is this the same wife that cheated on you with th…
JACK:
(Grabs him by the collar)
KEN:
Whoa, whoa okay I’m sorry. All I’m trying to say is I’m not the enemy. (grabs Jacks hands) let me go
JACK:
(Lets him go)
KEN:
Just trust me
                   (Ken walks into the living room as Jack slowly follows. They both sit down)
I apologize for my friends’ behavior he just needed some water
MAY:
It’s quite alright…so I trust we’re all here for business matters?
KEN:
Sure, sure…but before we start why don’t we all make a toast (looks to Jack) to good business.
         (They all touch glasses and begin to drink, before Mays drink touched her lips Jack smacks it out of her hand)
MAY:
(soaking wet) What the hell!
JACK:
I am so sorry…I thought I saw a fly!
MAY:
Ugh!
JACK:
(Pulls napkin out of pocket, tries to dry her off) I’m so sorry
MAY:
(Shrugs him off) Just forget it! (gets up) I’ll do it myself (walks into next room)
KEN:
What is your problem!?
JACK:
We can’t kill her
KEN:
Do you know what you just did!?
JACK:
Ken…
KEN:
(Pulls knife out of pocket) If you want it done right you gotta do it yourself (He walks toward the other room)
  (Jack grabs Ken from behind I an attempt to disarm him, The two wrestle for a while until Jack grabs the knife from Ken and in the heat of the moment kills him)
(Silence)
(May walks in and sees the gruesome scene)
MAY:
Oh my god! (tries to run)
JACK:
(Rushes to her) Wait! (takes off mustache) It’s me
                   (Silence)
MAY:
Jack? What are you…?
JACK:
I couldn’t tell you
MAY:
Jack but, but why?
JACK:
I couldn’t tell you I lost my job, so I had to…
MAY:
Jack just shut up! (Silence) You are so pathetic…Killing? Really? What next, are you gonna ask me to sell myself?
JACK:
No…
MAY:
How desperate are you? Does this make you feel like a man
JACK:
No it’s not th..!
MAY:
Are you just so weak that you just have to kill me?
JACK:
I never wanted to May I love y…
MAY:
Then kill me, huh? I know there’s a gun in your pocket (Mockingly) be a man Jack!
JACK:
(near tears) Stop saying that I’d never hurt you!
MAY:
I don’t even know why I married you any more, lost your job and then you try to kill and can’t even do it. I hold no guilty conscience on my affair,(silence)your pathetic (Begins to walk out)
(Jack takes a sudden change of character; he gets up, takes gun out of his pocket and shoots her on her way out. Here is silence as he goes into the previous room were Kens body lays, reaches into his pocket and pulls out a phone and begins to dial)
JACK:
Boss?...Yea mission complete…Yea, before you go, I want to tell you I quit…Only by death huh?...Okay…Okay I’ll be waiting (He tosses phone, loosens his tie and sits in silence)