The Breakup

Jamie gave her soon to be ex-boyfriend a disgusted look, as he got up from the barstool and staggered into the men's room. When he emerged from the restroom, she didn't know whether to laugh or cry, because his shirt sticking out of his fly. She knew he was no 'Straight Arrow' when they started dating, but this was ridiculous.

"Come on big guy, it's time to get going," she said, as she deftly slipped under his arm, and started steering him towards the exit.

"Whassa probum baby. Da fun juss staring," said Mike, as he tried to break free.

Jamie tightened her grip and pushed forward. "Oh no, I think you've had plenty of fun for one night."

It took her ten minutes of fumbling, groping and arguing to extract his keys and wrangle him into the backseat of his car. Mercifully, he passed out on the ride to his apartment.

When they arrived, she sighed and then slumped down in her seat. After massaging her temples for a minute, she thought. Good lord girl, you really can pick'em, Then a mischievous smile crossed her face, and she started rifling though her purse for a Sharpie. But I know how to un-pick'em too.

She climbed into the backseat and wrote on his forehead:

Thanks for the wonderful time Mikey.
I'd like to see you again soon, but I'm
going to be really busy for the next year.

Because she ran out of room, she finished up on his cheek.

Don't call me, I'll call you.
Love, Jamie
OXOX

When she finished, she pulled out her pone to call a cab. Before putting her phone away, she used its camera to snap a few photos of Mike, and sent them to all her friends.

******

294 Words