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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/akfx
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8 Public Reviews Given
8 Total Reviews Given
Public Reviews
1
1
Review of The writer in me  
Review by Richard Marshall
Rated: E | (4.5)
I am sure a lot of folks have said how much they can relate to this confession. I wrote my first story for fifth grade English. As long as you write something you are a writer. It is profound how much of the first paragraph mirrors my own ups and downs. Also, "stories stay in my head" I am glad I am not the only one lol.
2
2
Review by Richard Marshall
Rated: E | (2.5)
A great reflection on current culture. I am interested as to where said 'hate' is going towards a group or someone in particular. And what is the bait for the ire?

inventions=cell phone?

Its title is true that it is 'profound'
3
3
Review of relationships  
Review by Richard Marshall
Rated: E | (2.0)
Double space and work on grammar and sentences. Try condensing your points and restructure what you are saying. Your language is to the point and I like that
4
4
Review by Richard Marshall
Rated: E | (3.5)
Try rephrasing the second sentence. We already know there was no-one to look out for him.

Also, is a lion little when he is ten years old?

the language is simple and great for children. I think me niece would have liked it. Go ahead and expand, will Charlie have more adventures?
5
5
Review by Richard Marshall
Rated: E | (3.5)
"sand-dust palpitations"- I love that and the analogy between the trail and a horror flick.
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