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5 Public Reviews Given
5 Total Reviews Given
Public Reviews
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Review of Black Roses  
Review by Lana K Px
Rated: 13+ | (3.5)
I read through most of your portfolio and I noticed that you write a lot about circumstances similar to this story, losing your loved ones through war, through death... The title intrigued me, I think it's a very good hook for any story, knowing how obsessed people are with death nowadays. You have this ability of narrating the intensity of emotions, and, in this case, grief, and I really appreciated how you brought the situation to a certain crude reality, often overshadowed by style exercises: it is very easy to relate to. I enjoyed your story immensely.
My only criticism for you is that you always start and stop your stories at very infuriating moments: perhaps that is your intention, but it leaves me, someone who enjoys intricate plots and detailed, realistic characters, very frustrated. Maybe think about writing more, developing your storylines, really appealing to the pathos of your readers. I feel as if you have this talent of reaching out to your reader's emotions, but you do not go all the way. DO NOT BE SCARED, DEVELOP, YOU HAVE TALENT.
Keep writing, I honestly really enjoy your work.
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Review by Lana K Px
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
I was immediately hooked and it's an excellent start to a novel, can't wait to read more
I think the concept if very interesting, and the fact that Athenais drinks gives her a unique edge, and she is already an intriguing character in my eyes.
I suggest perhaps shortening some of the action sequences? And adding a little more detail to your descriptions. Perhaps this is personal taste but I think that in a story like this where everything is new and fictional, it is important to add detail to everything.
Other than that remark, I think this is great and I will continue reading on
:)
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