I love the pictures you have painted in my mind. I could actually feel the chill in the air.It is the same feeling I have around winter's lengthening shadows. The comparison of Winter as a Queen reigning over the land casting icy fingers made me think of the wicked Queen in Snow White. Well done. Just shows that using the right words you do not need more. Sometimes, less is better.
I like the subject and the flow of your words. You helped to form a picture in my mind at each step. Your rhyme scheme was well done, not stilted with words that rhymed but with no further purpose. I think this might indeed appeal to children in the 8-12 year old group.
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