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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/darkknight99
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8 Public Reviews Given
18 Total Reviews Given
Public Reviews
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Review of TANTALIZING  
Review by Alex Alvarado
Rated: E | (3.5)
Almost perfect, just the part where you say "Just trust your heart and come to me." I think it would be better if it was left as one sentence to give firm composition to the eye. It could also serve as a start of second paragraph if fitting is an issue. Thats about it, great read although a little too brief I think. Kinda wanted to know more about her. TC
Alex*Smile*
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Review of MY WHISPER  
Review by Alex Alvarado
Rated: E | (4.0)
This has become a familiar platform for me ainshu, and if I did poems like these for every girl I have met in the past, I would be a depressing wreck! lol Anyway you're rhyme is excellent in my opinion and its short to the point. You don't use any tricky metaphors that when used the wrong way, tend to bog down a good poem sometimes. It's a natural touch of the senses. Good Job!
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Review of Questions  
Review by Alex Alvarado
Rated: 18+ | (5.0)
"Did I like it?", someone asked and replied "Would you think I'm crazy if I did?"
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Review of The Raven Child  
Review by Alex Alvarado
Rated: 18+ | (3.5)
Interesting read. Good opportunity for maybe a series of stories based her character. Good story telling!
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Review of The Ticket  
Review by Alex Alvarado
Rated: ASR | (4.0)
LOL, funny stuff! That happened to me about twelve years ago. The only difference was four numbers of my usual had won and I didn't really tell anyone about my usual lucky numbers I play so I was safe from the possible murder, lol. I decided not to play that day and gave up over $1500 bucks! Augh!!! Anyway , you may wanna stay away from those psychic line, thats a whole other story for me! lol Good Job!
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Review by Alex Alvarado
Rated: E | (4.0)
Well written! I like the way you shadow the womans charactr in this first chapter. It made me want to know more about her, background, appearance, but most of all who Henry is based on. Is it a past lost lover, son, or even friend? Keep it up! Its a winner with the right combination.
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