Hi Fiore,
I am Jasmine. I've been around only for two days now. "What If' has a plot for novella. But should it be only dairy writing? pardon me if am going overboard by saying that the first paragragh lacks the feel of an Exposition. Thumbs up for the effort. Will be looking forward for the next chapter.
With regards,
Jasmine.
Hi adrift,
Iam a newbee, Jasmine... I liked the aa bb rhyme scheme in your poetry. I really appriciate the tone, "the unbreakable" spirit that runs through the poem. the pain of oppression is subtle, so much so the speaker emerges as a brave heart who has immense faith in God.Only the physical body can be put to torture and it undergoes pain. But the soul which is one with God can never be broken. The message sent home is powerful. the simplicity flows through seemlessly and intended message is conveyed.
Great job adrift.
HA HA HA ! I had a heartening laugh! Supereb ! Got carried away so much that I actually forgot to introduce myself. I am a new bee here, I call myself Jasmine. I just loved your story, Jyo. great one! light read... and a great read.
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