With a tinge of The Laurx's Truffula Trees
These Snuzzle fibers caused a societal FREEZE
The tale was clever and quite a delite
And the author wrote it all quite right
Laughter at ourselves and our silly ways
Will last forever in many ways
For now I'm snuzzled and quite a site
So I should say, a good read tonight!
Yes, I loved it in many ways
and I hope this review... pays!
I enjoyed this short story. I wasn't sure where it was heading, a lot of time was spent on lifestyle. I had expected the one brother to mention that he was gay, but the ending was just as intense.
The story did leave me wanting more. For that reason, I would suggest considering this for a longer short story or novel. I could see the brothers and sister working on their relationships in a novel. You have introduced me to this family and now I want to continue reading.
Overall, very good job. My only criticism would be that I felt a bit too much distance between the two. Was there bad feelings from the past? Why was their greeting hug guarded? Why is the wife almost bitter? To me that cancer ending, was out of the blue, because it didn't seem to represent anything in the story.
The poem put a smile on my face. I liked everything about this work, the cadence, word choice and subject matter. When a work invokes memories of my past, it becomes real. 'A Pet Shop Visit' made me think of all the gold fish that passed through my home on their way to fish heaven. I could see this in a children's book, especially if it was done with illustrations. Good job, but I would just put several periods to replace ass. (Fill in here) interrupted the flow and was not needed.
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